Now that everyone has already bought and received their holiday presents, I will offer some completely useless comments about... THE MOST ANNOYING TOYS!
First, a disclaimer. If you bought us any of these toys, don't fret. You may not have known they were so annoying. We might not have known they were so annoying until it was too late! And on the bright side, many of these most annoying toys are our kids' favorite toys so it's okay... at least you made them happy. On another note, if we have given any of these toys to your kids you may want to take a hint. We want you to be annoyed. Maybe it's fun to have other people suffering with us. On the other hand, maybe we just wanted to make your kids happy... at your expense.
(1) Kitty Keyboard (by Parents)- also known as Meowsic Keyboard (by Battat) or B. Meowsic Keyboard (by Toysmith). I can't believe I'm admitting to this but we actually bought this gift for Liam about 3 years ago for Hannukah with money from my grandma. We thought it was terrific... in the store. It was a keyboard, which would nurture our child's musical ability. There is a microphone to sing into! We liked the different features for musical beats and especially loved the instrument features. One instrument was the "Meow" feature and this is what really sold us. We thoroughly enjoyed the movie, Super Troopers, so any chance to turn Meow into music instantly appealed to us. At home we were amused by the Meow feature for only so long until we realized that the two song options- one with just plain annoying songs and the other with annoying songs about cats- were, well, annoying. And if you leave the kitty keyboard alone for too long she purrs. Let me tell you little kitty, if we leave you alone, it's because we want to and we certainly don't need a reminder 2 1/2 minutes later that you're still there.
(2) Lite Brite (by Hasbro)- Can't these people spell? Thank goodness we don't own a Lite Brite! I have nostalgia for owning a Lite Brite, I truly do. I remember my time with the Lite Brite fondly. I also don't doubt that my kids would love one- there's a similar exhibit at a local museum that they really like. But really, I could do without those teeny tiny transluscent pieces. So I'm quite thankful that we don't have a Lite Brite but I can empathize with anyone who does because it really seems quite annoying. Better to keep it in the daycare center!
(3) Busy Ball Popper (by Playskool)- Yet another company that can't spell! The Busy Ball Popper plays music as a fan blows into a tube filled with hollow balls that then fly out of the top of the Popper. Kids put the balls back on the track, they go back into the tube and it continues. This is a real favorite in our house... when I haven't hidden it away. No really, everyone loves it babies at 3 months to big kids. I've brought mine to school to demonstrate simple machines and electricity and the 9 & 10 year olds even love it. In fact, the Busy Ball Popper is so popular that it is instantly elevated to annoying status because kids enjoy playing with it over and over and over and over again so that the parents in the room are subjected to the same annoying music over and over again and often the responsibility is on us to (a) find the balls that have scattered around the room and (b) fish out other items that have been stuffed into the air tube (tissues don't come out on their own and neither do Legos). My brother-in-laws' family has owned at least 3 Busy Ball Poppers all of which become "broken" and thrown away. I'm pretty sure "Broken" just means out of batteries but in either case, they're out of the picture... until the next birthday perhaps.
(4) Xylophone sticks (by many companies)- I find xylophones to be nothing but trouble... because of the sticks. The sticks end up hitting anything and anyone except for the actual xylophone. The same goes for drumsticks. Musical talent does need to be fostered... but not on a pinewood table (they dent too easily).
(5) Sound Puzzles (by Melissa and Doug)- We have two sound puzzles. I bought the first one, it's a transportation puzzle. So if you put the car into the car slot it makes a vroom vroom sound. The airplane makes a taking off sound and the motorcycle makes a revving sound. The ambulance makes a siren sound, I should know because whenever I turn out the lights in the room that the puzzle is in, I hear the stupid ambulance. My brother-in-law (opposite side) once asked me what the most annoying toy we owned was. I said, "That stupid Kitty Keyboard!" Bill said, "That annoying transportation puzzle that makes the ambulance sound whenever we turn off the lights!" Meanwhile, Liam was opening up a gift from my sister and my brother-in-law. It was a musical instrument sound puzzle. Now whenever we turn out the lights, we hear an ambulance siren followed by a harmonica.
(6) Laugh and Learn Learning Puppy (by Fisher Price)- That seems redundant and repetitive, doesn't it? Joshua loves his Learning Puppy. It's a soft toy that plays music, talks, counts, says the parts of the body, sings the ABC's, etc... What we loathe about the Learning Puppy is that you press the off button on it's paw, it says "Good-bye" and then you press it's other paw and... it's singing again. Really? Didn't I just turn you off? Apparently you have to find the actual off switch under it's fur in the back (by the batteries) in order to turn off the Learning Puppy. If it's switched on, you may hear "Tummy" in a cheerful voice because you happened to throw something on top of it in the toy box. I say, if you have an off button on your paw, that means you're off. Am I right?
(7) Toys that say "I love you" (many brands)- I have a philosophical pet-peeve here. You don't love my baby. I love my baby. If a toys says, "I love you" to Liam or Joshua I plainly tell that the toy doesn't really love them, it's a recording on a toy. And then I tell them, I love them because I'm a real person and real people can love them... but a toy can't.
Before I conclude, I can't help but think that some of you out there may actually try to get my kids these things... because you want to annoy me. Don't think I am not aware of your intentions. If this gift comes to my house in wrapping and it starts making noise before we've even opened it and I hear a "Meow" or a "Choo Choo" or a "It's a great big colorful world out there..." I promise you, I will return the favor on your kid's (or kids') birthday(s)!
Monday, December 27, 2010
Sunday, December 19, 2010
On Gaming, Cell Phones & Other Gadgets
Are my kids technologically disadvantaged? I ask this in all sincerity. If you've ever seen Liam play Wii Mario Kart, you would know what I mean. He was recently playing while doing somersaults on the couch. He didn't do too well on Rainbow Road. It's really not his fault. We didn't even get a Wii until last Christmas (age almost-4) and the Mario Kart didn't come until a few months later. So he's had very little training. Over the summer Bill uploaded a few classic games onto the Wii including Super Mario Brothers. Why is it that Liam continues to try to run over the ditch? I say "the ditch" because he hasn't gotten past the first one independently. My 4 year old nephew came over and it turns out he plays Mario Kart with more skill than me (I should preface this by saying I'm not that good). Don't get me started on Joshua. We haven't even started his gaming training. But then again, he's just learning how to hold a marker.
Why is this even a big deal? Because I'm concerned about my boys' futures. It seems ever more apparent that this world around us is being built up around gadgets and technology. When I was in college, trying to keep up a long distance relationship, we still used email with a black backscreen and green letters. I can only imagine how terrific texting would have been. And now elementary schoolers have their own cell phones (for the record, I've yet to see one in the classroom... or hear one ringing in a backpack for that matter). In a world where ten year olds know how to text, you've got to start wondering with your preschooler if it's time to step it up a bit. I mean, doesn't he need to practice dexterity on a small keyboard... or maybe that's even out of date... so maybe we should just skip the keyboard and go right to touchscreen.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not currently standing in line at Radio Shack to purchase my kid an I-Pod. Although I did look into the Crayola MP3 player for Christmas... until I realized he doesn't know how to read yet so how could he choose songs? I'm okay with taking baby steps into the world of technology. We don't have a V-Tech or a V-Smile (although he does have a Smart Cycle). And I'm not into all of those learning video games. Let me explain that from a teaching perspective... I see Liam playing educational games. The Smart Cycle says to bump into the letters A, B & C. Liam drives the cycle furiously with no regard for letters, kicking off incorrect letter after incorrect letter until he gets the right one... and then he's off in search of D, E & F. He plays the games on Sesame Street (at pbskids.org) and could care less whether he gets an answer right or wrong. In fact, sometimes he prefers the negative buzzer more than the positive bell ringing. He's got a Leapster and I've seen him pressing his share of random buttons. So am I turning my kid into a random button pusher? My point is, that whether he's playing with the Leapster or Leappad, they don't give the type of feedback that real teaching can; and because of that, they just can't teach a kid to read or write on their own.
What will the world be like in five years when Liam turns 9? Will fourth graders be bringing their cell phones to school? Hmmm... I don't think things actually move that fast. But I certainly don't want Liam to be that tenth grader whose parents won't buy him the texting plan- or who has to use a pay phone to call his parents to get picked up from school. But on the other hand, I probably won't be the parent who stands in line at the cell phone store at midnight to get him the newest smart phone model. No, he'll have to make do with our left over flip phones (just kidding, we haven't bought a flip phone in years). And maybe I'll get him to train intensely on just one or two videogames so he's a pro. I know too many kids who have all of the gaming systems- X-Box, PS2, Wii and Kinect (okay, I"m probably totally wrong here, there's probably a few more significant systems) AND a DS! On a side note- doesn't anyone think that's all a major racket- buying all new systems and games every time the next best thing comes out? I still have my Game Boy. Maybe I'll teach Liam and Joshua how to play Tetris so they can wow all of their friends with their powers of strategic thinking... Hmmm... Or maybe they'd be better off if we just stuck with Mario Kart. There's only so many times you can slide your scooter from the ice flow into the frigid arctic waters before your friends start to only invite you over so they can make fun of you and inflate their egos.
Why is this even a big deal? Because I'm concerned about my boys' futures. It seems ever more apparent that this world around us is being built up around gadgets and technology. When I was in college, trying to keep up a long distance relationship, we still used email with a black backscreen and green letters. I can only imagine how terrific texting would have been. And now elementary schoolers have their own cell phones (for the record, I've yet to see one in the classroom... or hear one ringing in a backpack for that matter). In a world where ten year olds know how to text, you've got to start wondering with your preschooler if it's time to step it up a bit. I mean, doesn't he need to practice dexterity on a small keyboard... or maybe that's even out of date... so maybe we should just skip the keyboard and go right to touchscreen.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not currently standing in line at Radio Shack to purchase my kid an I-Pod. Although I did look into the Crayola MP3 player for Christmas... until I realized he doesn't know how to read yet so how could he choose songs? I'm okay with taking baby steps into the world of technology. We don't have a V-Tech or a V-Smile (although he does have a Smart Cycle). And I'm not into all of those learning video games. Let me explain that from a teaching perspective... I see Liam playing educational games. The Smart Cycle says to bump into the letters A, B & C. Liam drives the cycle furiously with no regard for letters, kicking off incorrect letter after incorrect letter until he gets the right one... and then he's off in search of D, E & F. He plays the games on Sesame Street (at pbskids.org) and could care less whether he gets an answer right or wrong. In fact, sometimes he prefers the negative buzzer more than the positive bell ringing. He's got a Leapster and I've seen him pressing his share of random buttons. So am I turning my kid into a random button pusher? My point is, that whether he's playing with the Leapster or Leappad, they don't give the type of feedback that real teaching can; and because of that, they just can't teach a kid to read or write on their own.
What will the world be like in five years when Liam turns 9? Will fourth graders be bringing their cell phones to school? Hmmm... I don't think things actually move that fast. But I certainly don't want Liam to be that tenth grader whose parents won't buy him the texting plan- or who has to use a pay phone to call his parents to get picked up from school. But on the other hand, I probably won't be the parent who stands in line at the cell phone store at midnight to get him the newest smart phone model. No, he'll have to make do with our left over flip phones (just kidding, we haven't bought a flip phone in years). And maybe I'll get him to train intensely on just one or two videogames so he's a pro. I know too many kids who have all of the gaming systems- X-Box, PS2, Wii and Kinect (okay, I"m probably totally wrong here, there's probably a few more significant systems) AND a DS! On a side note- doesn't anyone think that's all a major racket- buying all new systems and games every time the next best thing comes out? I still have my Game Boy. Maybe I'll teach Liam and Joshua how to play Tetris so they can wow all of their friends with their powers of strategic thinking... Hmmm... Or maybe they'd be better off if we just stuck with Mario Kart. There's only so many times you can slide your scooter from the ice flow into the frigid arctic waters before your friends start to only invite you over so they can make fun of you and inflate their egos.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Party Favors
Bouncy bounce, science museum, children's museum, skating rink, swimming pool and bowling alley- it's been a year of birthday parties. On a side note, I personally think the bouncy bounce was the most fun... for me. There's nothing quite so silly as a bunch of friends jumping around a bounce house... and occasionally letting their children bounce around too. On the other side of the spectrum... was the swimming pool. A birthday party for a kid turning 4 at a swimming pool? Huh? And this was at a swimming pool with no real shallow end! Not that I actually know this; Bill took Liam to that one. Apparently Liam was wearing a swim vest so was feeling so bold as the hang out in the very deep end, where Bill couldn't touch either so he had to paddle around after Liam for 45 minutes. Maybe Bill should have worn a swim vest too... Although this might not be Bill's least favorite considering he's had to sit through the same silly movie about the Kabooby Ruby (really, I did not make that up) at the local planetarium twice since September.
But seriously, the birthday parties are endless now that Liam has joined a preschool cohort. There are birthday parties every weekend almost, between his classmates, our friends & family. This weekend I asked Liam to please choose since he was invited to two birthdays- a bowling alley on Saturday and a skating rink today (Sunday). He opted for the skating. There are so many birthday parties that instead of having playdates among friends at his preschool, we've all just planned on meeting up at the next party.
On a positive note, it's just nothing but celebration after celebration... with a slew of screaming 3-5 year olds. Birthday parties have been following a certain formula recently. It seems we all meet up at a fabulous location and then hang out fairly independently of Liam's peers (i.e. skating with Mommy at the rink or bouncing from exhibit to exhibit shouting, "LOOK AT THE FISH! LOOK AT THE OWL! LISTEN TO ME RING THIS OBNOXIOUS BELL!", etc...). After this, the mass of children sits down and eats pizza, some small pieces of fruit and pretzels. Then there's the cake. And then the children go crazy. It's usually in a small room, clearly not meant for running, and yet this does not stop the children. They run in circles around the tables as though it was a planned activity. They run until one parent actually stops their child loudly and then the other parents are guilted into telling their children to stop running around like maniacs. And then everyone grabs a goodie bag and goes home.
Celebrations aside, this whole birthday party thing has me a little concerned. Liam & Joshua have birthdays coming up in March. So far our birthday parties have followed a certain formula... parents chatting upstairs, mass hysteria downstairs with minimal supervision, craft activity, possible game, cheap pizza and cake with store-bought ice cream. We enjoy some intimate traditions, like writing birthday notes to my kids on the same tablecloth each year and a cake I make following the given theme. And all of this is made possible by having the party at our own house. Aren't we enough bells and whistles? But this year I'm feeling like somethings may have to change. I doubt our current house could accommodate 20 more kids and their parents. And I doubt it would be enough anyway! So do we have two parties- one for family & friends and the other for classmates? Or do we have one big bash for everyone? And if so, where? It's been a few tough acts to follow one right after the other. But really, that's not what I'm as worried about. Maybe we'll go to the fire station and hire a magician... or better yet, rent the JCC gym so the kids running around like maniacs will be a planned activity. No, my biggest concern is the presents. See, we've been heading out the to store for each of these parties- for classmates, friends & family- buying this and that for all of these boys and girls. So what I'm really concerned about is this... they're all just about ready to return the favor. So then how many Etch-a-Sketches, Hungry Hungry Hippos and Mr. Potato Heads will we end up with?
But seriously, the birthday parties are endless now that Liam has joined a preschool cohort. There are birthday parties every weekend almost, between his classmates, our friends & family. This weekend I asked Liam to please choose since he was invited to two birthdays- a bowling alley on Saturday and a skating rink today (Sunday). He opted for the skating. There are so many birthday parties that instead of having playdates among friends at his preschool, we've all just planned on meeting up at the next party.
On a positive note, it's just nothing but celebration after celebration... with a slew of screaming 3-5 year olds. Birthday parties have been following a certain formula recently. It seems we all meet up at a fabulous location and then hang out fairly independently of Liam's peers (i.e. skating with Mommy at the rink or bouncing from exhibit to exhibit shouting, "LOOK AT THE FISH! LOOK AT THE OWL! LISTEN TO ME RING THIS OBNOXIOUS BELL!", etc...). After this, the mass of children sits down and eats pizza, some small pieces of fruit and pretzels. Then there's the cake. And then the children go crazy. It's usually in a small room, clearly not meant for running, and yet this does not stop the children. They run in circles around the tables as though it was a planned activity. They run until one parent actually stops their child loudly and then the other parents are guilted into telling their children to stop running around like maniacs. And then everyone grabs a goodie bag and goes home.
Celebrations aside, this whole birthday party thing has me a little concerned. Liam & Joshua have birthdays coming up in March. So far our birthday parties have followed a certain formula... parents chatting upstairs, mass hysteria downstairs with minimal supervision, craft activity, possible game, cheap pizza and cake with store-bought ice cream. We enjoy some intimate traditions, like writing birthday notes to my kids on the same tablecloth each year and a cake I make following the given theme. And all of this is made possible by having the party at our own house. Aren't we enough bells and whistles? But this year I'm feeling like somethings may have to change. I doubt our current house could accommodate 20 more kids and their parents. And I doubt it would be enough anyway! So do we have two parties- one for family & friends and the other for classmates? Or do we have one big bash for everyone? And if so, where? It's been a few tough acts to follow one right after the other. But really, that's not what I'm as worried about. Maybe we'll go to the fire station and hire a magician... or better yet, rent the JCC gym so the kids running around like maniacs will be a planned activity. No, my biggest concern is the presents. See, we've been heading out the to store for each of these parties- for classmates, friends & family- buying this and that for all of these boys and girls. So what I'm really concerned about is this... they're all just about ready to return the favor. So then how many Etch-a-Sketches, Hungry Hungry Hippos and Mr. Potato Heads will we end up with?
Monday, December 6, 2010
I'm All For Independence, But Does It Have To Be So Messy?
It's day 145 of our open cup training with Liam and so far we have had spills of juice on about 130 of those days. This is a battle I don't think we will win anytime soon. And yet it all started innocently when Liam started asking for juice in an open cup. And then we started to realize that he really is a big boy and soon will be in school... drinking out of a sippy? No, that just wouldn't do. It was time for Liam to become more independent. It was time for him to drink out of an open cup. Besides, Joshua was using the sippy cups so much by that point that we never had enough left in the cupboards. This is the price of independence... spilled juice.
What's truly hilarious about all of this spilled juice is its lack of effect on Liam. "Oh. I spilled my juice." And then he returns to eating his banana bread as juice pours over the side of the table, onto first his brother's legs, then the chair, seeping down to the floor. And Liam continues to eat his banana bread. He's ready to be independent enough to ask for the sippy cup but not to actually follow through with what is required of (a) drinking out of a cup without spilling or (b) dealing with repercussions of a great spill. I would love one day without spilled juice about as much as I would welcome a day without changing a diaper. Okay, that's ridiculous, of course I'd prefer a day without diapers!
Independence. It's what convinces Joshua to clamp down his teeth on top of his toothbrush so that there's no way I could possibly help him fight off cavities. It's what I wait for at the bottom of the stairs... when we're already all late for work & school... while Liam tries to zip up his coat. It's what we all yearn for but then can't stand when the time finally comes. Because independence takes time & patience- and I do tend to lack in both of these areas.
Having an independent child means you have to give up on being embarrassed. Just leave embarrassment at the front door. It's not a worthy emotion anymore. Because there is a strong likelihood that you will have to leave the house most days with a child whose clothing doesn't match. I know what can happen if a young boy grows up with no fashion sense. I once saw my father wear a plaid shirt with a polka dotted tie. Knowing this could be hereditary, Bill & I do tend to advise Liam when we can about his clothes. So when he came upstairs the other day wearing blue sweatpants, a green & gray striped long sleeved shirt and a short sleeved linen brown & blue bowling shirt; naturally Bill laughed and told him to take off at least two parts of the outfit and wear something else. Independent Liam had a hard time being convinced but eventually Bill found a matching brown shirt to wear under the bowling shirt with a pair of jeans. "Change the shirt or change the pants." Is usually one of the first things we say to Liam when we see him in the morning. Recently instead of saying that, I just told him to stand still so I could take a picture. He was wearing a red & gray striped long sleeved shirt under a blue and orange striped short sleeved shirt. It wasn't working. Ironically, Liam's fashion sense seems to be in fashion at his school. After a particularly fun morning of cajoling Liam out of sweatpants (those same pesky sweats), an oversized t-shirt and a nice but tighter fitting sweater; Bill entered the classroom only to see another boy wearing sweats, an oversized t-shirt covered by a too-tight sweater. Who knew? Liam tells us the top shirt is what everyone wears. To encourage his independence I decided to buy him those 2-in-1 shirts that are on sale at Old Navy.
Independence is inevitable. And young people need time to develop their own skills through independent practice. So maybe the concept of matching isn't quite sticking yet. And perhaps it's okay that I have to change Joshua's shirt after he eats breakfast each day (because you can't go to the sitter's wearing oatmeal no matter what type of fashion sense you have). Still, I kind of wish Liam & Josh would become more independent in some of these areas because I'm getting really sick of waiting... and waiting... or just doing it myself.
(1) Buckling seatbelts in the car.
(2) Tying shoes.
(3) Writing thank you cards.
(4) Folding laundry (correctly).
(5) Soaping their own hair in the tub.
(6) Remembering to close the door.
(7) Spitting into the sink after brushing teeth (not the side of the sink).
(8) Getting their own breakfast when they wake up before 8 am on a weekend.
(9) Changing his own diaper (Bonus: applying diaper cream)- this one is for Josh specifically.
(10) Cleaning up spilled juice.
What's truly hilarious about all of this spilled juice is its lack of effect on Liam. "Oh. I spilled my juice." And then he returns to eating his banana bread as juice pours over the side of the table, onto first his brother's legs, then the chair, seeping down to the floor. And Liam continues to eat his banana bread. He's ready to be independent enough to ask for the sippy cup but not to actually follow through with what is required of (a) drinking out of a cup without spilling or (b) dealing with repercussions of a great spill. I would love one day without spilled juice about as much as I would welcome a day without changing a diaper. Okay, that's ridiculous, of course I'd prefer a day without diapers!
Independence. It's what convinces Joshua to clamp down his teeth on top of his toothbrush so that there's no way I could possibly help him fight off cavities. It's what I wait for at the bottom of the stairs... when we're already all late for work & school... while Liam tries to zip up his coat. It's what we all yearn for but then can't stand when the time finally comes. Because independence takes time & patience- and I do tend to lack in both of these areas.
Having an independent child means you have to give up on being embarrassed. Just leave embarrassment at the front door. It's not a worthy emotion anymore. Because there is a strong likelihood that you will have to leave the house most days with a child whose clothing doesn't match. I know what can happen if a young boy grows up with no fashion sense. I once saw my father wear a plaid shirt with a polka dotted tie. Knowing this could be hereditary, Bill & I do tend to advise Liam when we can about his clothes. So when he came upstairs the other day wearing blue sweatpants, a green & gray striped long sleeved shirt and a short sleeved linen brown & blue bowling shirt; naturally Bill laughed and told him to take off at least two parts of the outfit and wear something else. Independent Liam had a hard time being convinced but eventually Bill found a matching brown shirt to wear under the bowling shirt with a pair of jeans. "Change the shirt or change the pants." Is usually one of the first things we say to Liam when we see him in the morning. Recently instead of saying that, I just told him to stand still so I could take a picture. He was wearing a red & gray striped long sleeved shirt under a blue and orange striped short sleeved shirt. It wasn't working. Ironically, Liam's fashion sense seems to be in fashion at his school. After a particularly fun morning of cajoling Liam out of sweatpants (those same pesky sweats), an oversized t-shirt and a nice but tighter fitting sweater; Bill entered the classroom only to see another boy wearing sweats, an oversized t-shirt covered by a too-tight sweater. Who knew? Liam tells us the top shirt is what everyone wears. To encourage his independence I decided to buy him those 2-in-1 shirts that are on sale at Old Navy.
Independence is inevitable. And young people need time to develop their own skills through independent practice. So maybe the concept of matching isn't quite sticking yet. And perhaps it's okay that I have to change Joshua's shirt after he eats breakfast each day (because you can't go to the sitter's wearing oatmeal no matter what type of fashion sense you have). Still, I kind of wish Liam & Josh would become more independent in some of these areas because I'm getting really sick of waiting... and waiting... or just doing it myself.
(1) Buckling seatbelts in the car.
(2) Tying shoes.
(3) Writing thank you cards.
(4) Folding laundry (correctly).
(5) Soaping their own hair in the tub.
(6) Remembering to close the door.
(7) Spitting into the sink after brushing teeth (not the side of the sink).
(8) Getting their own breakfast when they wake up before 8 am on a weekend.
(9) Changing his own diaper (Bonus: applying diaper cream)- this one is for Josh specifically.
(10) Cleaning up spilled juice.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Now our house looks just like Santa's house... except for the dreidels
I was brought up in a small town so I immediately assumed that my parents did not consider it a priority for me to marry a Jewish man. Or maybe they didn't exactly intend for me to meet my husband in high school? Well, regardless, I did not go off to college to meet a nice Jewish boy. I stuck with my perfectly nice atheist instead. The boy who once said to a priest at Easter, "Hey, I saw you last Christmas". So growing up he was a Creaster. And now he watches conspiracy shows on the "History" Channel about alien ancestors (he just thinks they're interesting; not necessarily true). But this isn't about Bill, or me, it's about our kids.
Okay, back to me. I have always taken issue with this whole blurring of the lines between Hannukah and Christmas. I don't do the Hannukah bush and we certainly don't get visited by Hannukah Harry. I believe in a peaceful coexistance and appreciation of both holidays. So in our house we have Christmas take-over with... a Hannukah corner in the dining room. Seriously, Christmas seeps out of the pores in our house whereas Hannukah occupies the top of a china hutch. Is this because Bill has taken over? Yeah right. No, it's all me. I put up most of household Christmas decorations. We decorated the tree together as a family, while drinking eggnog and listening to carols on the TV. The truth is, ever since I was a little child; I've loved Christmas. I understand there's deeper meaning for Christians but for the me, the traditions of Christmas are fascinatingly wonderful and I feel that they can peacefully coexist with my little holiday of Hannukah. More about Hannukah later...
Growing up in this small town, I found it in my best interest to become adopted by Christian families around the holiday seasons. So it started off with just decorating the tree with a family friend, then eating a formal Christmas Eve dinner to finally just immersing myself completely by eating the dinner and then sticking around to go to Mass, sleeping over listening for Santa on the roof and waking up to my own stocking and gifts (from my mom- who fully endorsed my holiday-adoption) under my friend's family's tree. Eventually I became adopted by my future in-laws and have been spending my holidays ever since with them. So you see, this is not new, my love of Christmas.
But what of the children? And why does Hannukah have such a small corner of our house? Well, it's a lot like the real world, first of all. With sparkling red garlands hanging from the rafters, choirs singing the Messiah (some of my favorite musical pieces to sing), Christmas trees galore and you get the picture... and then one lonely plastic menorah lit up on the storefront window. Does this mean there should be a bigger menorah? Should the chorus have opted for less "New Born King" and more "Dreidel Dreidel Dreidel"? Perhaps, but not on my account. See, Hannukah is a great holiday. It's fun, it commemorates a miracle, sure, but in the grand scheme of Jewish holidays... it's not among the holiest. And our holiest holidays aren't really the type that get malls all excited either (no gift buying for Yom Kippur... no grocery lists... in fact, no eating at all).
And so it is in our house, we celebrate both. They exist peacefully in the same home with some Hannukah dreidels making their way to the coffee table on the Christmas quilt and some gifts wrapped in Santa paper being opened on a Hannukah night. And Liam telling his teachers at the Jewish Community Center preschool that his favorite holiday is Christamas. Okay, maybe I'm not making it any easier. Afterall, I'll admit to giving Christmas pajamas as a gift for Hannukah- But I only do it so they can get some use out of the PJ's in the month of December!
Okay, back to me. I have always taken issue with this whole blurring of the lines between Hannukah and Christmas. I don't do the Hannukah bush and we certainly don't get visited by Hannukah Harry. I believe in a peaceful coexistance and appreciation of both holidays. So in our house we have Christmas take-over with... a Hannukah corner in the dining room. Seriously, Christmas seeps out of the pores in our house whereas Hannukah occupies the top of a china hutch. Is this because Bill has taken over? Yeah right. No, it's all me. I put up most of household Christmas decorations. We decorated the tree together as a family, while drinking eggnog and listening to carols on the TV. The truth is, ever since I was a little child; I've loved Christmas. I understand there's deeper meaning for Christians but for the me, the traditions of Christmas are fascinatingly wonderful and I feel that they can peacefully coexist with my little holiday of Hannukah. More about Hannukah later...
Growing up in this small town, I found it in my best interest to become adopted by Christian families around the holiday seasons. So it started off with just decorating the tree with a family friend, then eating a formal Christmas Eve dinner to finally just immersing myself completely by eating the dinner and then sticking around to go to Mass, sleeping over listening for Santa on the roof and waking up to my own stocking and gifts (from my mom- who fully endorsed my holiday-adoption) under my friend's family's tree. Eventually I became adopted by my future in-laws and have been spending my holidays ever since with them. So you see, this is not new, my love of Christmas.
But what of the children? And why does Hannukah have such a small corner of our house? Well, it's a lot like the real world, first of all. With sparkling red garlands hanging from the rafters, choirs singing the Messiah (some of my favorite musical pieces to sing), Christmas trees galore and you get the picture... and then one lonely plastic menorah lit up on the storefront window. Does this mean there should be a bigger menorah? Should the chorus have opted for less "New Born King" and more "Dreidel Dreidel Dreidel"? Perhaps, but not on my account. See, Hannukah is a great holiday. It's fun, it commemorates a miracle, sure, but in the grand scheme of Jewish holidays... it's not among the holiest. And our holiest holidays aren't really the type that get malls all excited either (no gift buying for Yom Kippur... no grocery lists... in fact, no eating at all).
And so it is in our house, we celebrate both. They exist peacefully in the same home with some Hannukah dreidels making their way to the coffee table on the Christmas quilt and some gifts wrapped in Santa paper being opened on a Hannukah night. And Liam telling his teachers at the Jewish Community Center preschool that his favorite holiday is Christamas. Okay, maybe I'm not making it any easier. Afterall, I'll admit to giving Christmas pajamas as a gift for Hannukah- But I only do it so they can get some use out of the PJ's in the month of December!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Bye Bye Binky... Bye Bye Baby
Is it time to say good-bye to baby? Whether you call them binkies, pacifiers, nooks or soothers, when is it really time to just dump them in the trash? I can state decisively right now that if your child is riding his/her bike and you're asking yourself this question; you've waited too long. And if your kid can climb up the playground ladders and slide down the slide on his/her own; again you've waited too long... and if your child has done both at the same time (riden his/her bike to the playground & played independently all while sucking on an oversized pacifier), it was probably me who was looking at you funny.
I hadn't really thought much about when to wean Joshua of his binky. And to be entirely upfront, Joshua doesn't just have one binky. He prefers three. One for his mouth and two for his hands. And then to be entirely gloating, we have already drawn the line at the crib and I'm happy to report that Joshua will most often even leave his binkies in there after sleepy time and/or throw them back into the crib after his diaper change. I think we have the binky thing under control. My mom-instincts (i.e. the voice that says, "It worked with the first one, it'll probably work with this one too.") tell me that we can wait until Joshua is a little bit older, say birthday #2, he'll drop one binky into the trash as a symbolic gesture and we'll never hear about them again. So then why am I starting to get so worried even though the day-of-truth is still four months away?
And what about this new trend? I hear moms are weaning their kids of binkies at 3-4 months! Now what's the point of a binky if you can't hush up a screaming six month old? And do they really want to face the I'm-a-manipulative-10-month-old (my child psych class taught me that at 10 months children do indeed learn to be manipulative) -who-cries-until-you-get-into-the-room-and-then-smiles-only-to-whail-again-when-you-leave without a binky?. What about the three hour nap? Isn't that only made possible by binkies? When I think of all of the grocery store trips where a binky came in handy; of all the times we had forgotten a binky and WISHED we hadn't... and to think these well intentioned moms are weaning so soon! Hmmmm... I'm forgetting something aren't I... the baby's benefit perhaps. Maybe there are psychological benefits to babies who are weaned of binkies at earlier ages. Maybe they're less likely to suck their thumbs? But herein lies a quandary... what if when they are deprived of a binky they actually become compelled to suck their thumbs... ooh. I just couldn't take that risk.
So apparently I've already waited about 14 months too long. So what's another 4? And I don't even have to worry about what other moms think because at least my kid riding a bike while sucking on a binky! He's enjoying his little baby-addiction in the comfort of his own crib... while drinking his bottle ("ba ba") of warm milk. Now can't we just enjoy our babies for a little bit longer and let them keep their binkies and bottles? What is the rush to saying bye-bye baby anyway?
I hadn't really thought much about when to wean Joshua of his binky. And to be entirely upfront, Joshua doesn't just have one binky. He prefers three. One for his mouth and two for his hands. And then to be entirely gloating, we have already drawn the line at the crib and I'm happy to report that Joshua will most often even leave his binkies in there after sleepy time and/or throw them back into the crib after his diaper change. I think we have the binky thing under control. My mom-instincts (i.e. the voice that says, "It worked with the first one, it'll probably work with this one too.") tell me that we can wait until Joshua is a little bit older, say birthday #2, he'll drop one binky into the trash as a symbolic gesture and we'll never hear about them again. So then why am I starting to get so worried even though the day-of-truth is still four months away?
And what about this new trend? I hear moms are weaning their kids of binkies at 3-4 months! Now what's the point of a binky if you can't hush up a screaming six month old? And do they really want to face the I'm-a-manipulative-10-month-old (my child psych class taught me that at 10 months children do indeed learn to be manipulative) -who-cries-until-you-get-into-the-room-and-then-smiles-only-to-whail-again-when-you-leave without a binky?. What about the three hour nap? Isn't that only made possible by binkies? When I think of all of the grocery store trips where a binky came in handy; of all the times we had forgotten a binky and WISHED we hadn't... and to think these well intentioned moms are weaning so soon! Hmmmm... I'm forgetting something aren't I... the baby's benefit perhaps. Maybe there are psychological benefits to babies who are weaned of binkies at earlier ages. Maybe they're less likely to suck their thumbs? But herein lies a quandary... what if when they are deprived of a binky they actually become compelled to suck their thumbs... ooh. I just couldn't take that risk.
So apparently I've already waited about 14 months too long. So what's another 4? And I don't even have to worry about what other moms think because at least my kid riding a bike while sucking on a binky! He's enjoying his little baby-addiction in the comfort of his own crib... while drinking his bottle ("ba ba") of warm milk. Now can't we just enjoy our babies for a little bit longer and let them keep their binkies and bottles? What is the rush to saying bye-bye baby anyway?
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
You Can't Always Get What You Want
I know why the terrible twos are so terrible. And just for the record, they're not just the terrible twos. Bill & I think the "terribles" track more along the 1/2 years. So 1 1/2 years, 2 1/2 years, etc... but that's besides the point. From about 15-30 months young children struggle to communicate with their elders and peers. But yet they know that there is a mode of communication out there. So they know that there is speech, but they can't quite get there themselves. Either that, or they think that their use of language is perfectly sufficient so it's your problem for not catching on quicker. Both theories support the idea that kids of this age will likely be more frustrated and temperamental, because they know what they want, they know there's a way to communicate what they want but they're failing to do so sufficiently.
Being wise to this, I started Joshua on sign language at a very early age. We practiced the sign "more" by touching his fingers together, mostly at mealtimes. Really, that's the only sign language I taught Josh. I thought it was the most significant because often when toddlers want something, they get emotional and forget how to speak (kind of like many of us adults). So I thought "more" would be a good term to learn first. But then I didn't know any other sign language so "more" continues to be the only sign in our vocabulary.
And who wouldn't want more dinosaur chicken? More corn? More of his favorite cartoon? Recently we've been quite proud of our little communicator, asking us for more and even trying to sound it out himself ("muh"). Even Liam responds to Josh's requests for more. Until I realized he wasn't quite asking for "more", but rather just telling us what he wanted. Yesterday he was eating a bowl of chips with salsa but when he said "more", he wasn't asking for more chips. He was asking for Ritz crackers (this took awhile to figure out). Ever since Halloween, he has been pointing to the bucket asking for "more". It's not that hard for me to explain to Liam why we can't have a lot of candy... but Joshua just doesn't seem to grasp the concepts of cavities and hyperactivity yet.
I think "more" is insufficient. I probably should have studied up on some more sign language vocabulary. I think sign language is really needed for a variety of statements, actually. Toddlers do struggle so much to communicate with us, don't you think it would be easier for them to just say with a quick sign, "I'm not really sick, I just want your undivided attention for the next 3 hours". Sign language could help a younger sibling communicate with his older brother or sister, "Leave me alone" or better yet, "When I'm old enough, I will beat you up." And it really could help us solve a significant loss problem in our house; I really do wish there was a sign for, "I dropped your Blue Tooth behind the couch." What we really need is one of those communicators you find in movies like "Up" and "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs"- you know, the one that makes the dog talk in Up and the monkey talk in Cloudy...? Yeah, then a toddler could really get their message across clearly! Like, for example, "I have a poopy diaper, it's really uncomfortable, but I don't want you to change it and if you do I will do all sorts of leg kicks and twists and flips and then run away from you naked."
That's the fun thing about this stage of communication. A lot of it is guessing! And, of course, there's always the balancing act of knowing what that kid of yours is crying over and actually giving it to him or her. But if he uses the "more" sign, shouldn't we just reward that communication? Or will that just make the next stage so much harder- the stage of realizing that you can ask for what you want... but you might not get it anyway. Kind of like candy. Because there's no way I'm giving my baby a candy bar every time Joshua says "more" looking at that bright orange bucket. Afterall, if I did, then there wouldn't be any chocolate left for me...
Being wise to this, I started Joshua on sign language at a very early age. We practiced the sign "more" by touching his fingers together, mostly at mealtimes. Really, that's the only sign language I taught Josh. I thought it was the most significant because often when toddlers want something, they get emotional and forget how to speak (kind of like many of us adults). So I thought "more" would be a good term to learn first. But then I didn't know any other sign language so "more" continues to be the only sign in our vocabulary.
And who wouldn't want more dinosaur chicken? More corn? More of his favorite cartoon? Recently we've been quite proud of our little communicator, asking us for more and even trying to sound it out himself ("muh"). Even Liam responds to Josh's requests for more. Until I realized he wasn't quite asking for "more", but rather just telling us what he wanted. Yesterday he was eating a bowl of chips with salsa but when he said "more", he wasn't asking for more chips. He was asking for Ritz crackers (this took awhile to figure out). Ever since Halloween, he has been pointing to the bucket asking for "more". It's not that hard for me to explain to Liam why we can't have a lot of candy... but Joshua just doesn't seem to grasp the concepts of cavities and hyperactivity yet.
I think "more" is insufficient. I probably should have studied up on some more sign language vocabulary. I think sign language is really needed for a variety of statements, actually. Toddlers do struggle so much to communicate with us, don't you think it would be easier for them to just say with a quick sign, "I'm not really sick, I just want your undivided attention for the next 3 hours". Sign language could help a younger sibling communicate with his older brother or sister, "Leave me alone" or better yet, "When I'm old enough, I will beat you up." And it really could help us solve a significant loss problem in our house; I really do wish there was a sign for, "I dropped your Blue Tooth behind the couch." What we really need is one of those communicators you find in movies like "Up" and "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs"- you know, the one that makes the dog talk in Up and the monkey talk in Cloudy...? Yeah, then a toddler could really get their message across clearly! Like, for example, "I have a poopy diaper, it's really uncomfortable, but I don't want you to change it and if you do I will do all sorts of leg kicks and twists and flips and then run away from you naked."
That's the fun thing about this stage of communication. A lot of it is guessing! And, of course, there's always the balancing act of knowing what that kid of yours is crying over and actually giving it to him or her. But if he uses the "more" sign, shouldn't we just reward that communication? Or will that just make the next stage so much harder- the stage of realizing that you can ask for what you want... but you might not get it anyway. Kind of like candy. Because there's no way I'm giving my baby a candy bar every time Joshua says "more" looking at that bright orange bucket. Afterall, if I did, then there wouldn't be any chocolate left for me...
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Of all the things I've lost, it's my composure (and cell phone) I miss the most
Some of my most vivid moments of my mother are of her losing her keys... and then finding them in her purse. Sorry mom, I remember lots of other things too, good things, but I do remember you losing your keys a lot. "Where are my keys?" was the first thing I could expect to hear when we got in the car on our way to school, the grocery store or anything else.
So that panic of losing the keys is never too far away from any of us, I think. At least none of us with big, full purses. I think I lose my keys about as often as my mother did. The difference is I don't ask my teenage daughter, "Where are my keys?" I just try to calmly look for them in the purse where they're supposed to be. And sometimes they're not there. Sometimes the keys are in a coat pocket or on the banister. But usually there are the keys, hiding in a dimly lit corner of my purse.
It really came as no surprise to me the other day when I lost my cell phone. I've lost it plenty of times before. Cell phones are no longer those bulky shiny things that used to stretch our pants pockets. No, mine is a cute little Pixi. It's thin, black and unassuming. And that's why I lose it so often. Once I searched everywhere, even had the neighbor calling me, only to find it 15 minutes later on top of the coffee maker (which is also black). So losing it in my fake black Coach bag (I was recently informed- nicely- that it's a fake, just thought I'd be upfront) was no surprise.
I emptied out the contents of the el-cheapo bag I had gotten as a hand-me-down (kind of hoping it was real but not wanting to ask) but to no avail. There was no cell phone in there. I looked in my shopping bags, not there either. I told Liam I was stressed, he didn't seem affected. I informed Liam and Josh we were all going to have to get out of the car and look for the phone together. The kids were already strapped in. As each mother out there knows, once the kids are strapped in, getting out of the car really is not desirable. I mean, the hard work is done, the wrestling is over and it's time to go home. But no, we had to go back to the store.
And go back to the store we did. We went back to both stores, two times each. We retraced steps. We stopped back at stores we hadn't been to, but maybe someone had turned in a cell phone dropped on the sidewalk? I started to panic. I was wearing a winter coat and it was getting very hot. And I was in a complete state of flusteredness. Liam was very cooperative, for a four year old. He even splayed himself flat onto the filthy store floor to look under shelves for the phone. People started to look at me, not out of helpfulness or even pity but out of fear- who is this crazy lady and her wild children? Why does she keep telling her kid, she's a bit stressed? Why didn't she bring her baby in a stroller? Yes, in my infinite wisdom during this wild goose chase, I had decided to carry Joshua instead of pushing him in a stroller. Because apparently taking the extra 3 1/2 minutes to get the stroller... was out of the question. And this was about the time that Joshua decided to practice his butterfly stroke which involved precisely timed, strong kicks with both legs; folding himself in half and pulling my hair. It was lovely.
At one store we stopped in, while I waited in line, I suggested to Liam that he play with some toys I saw set up for... kids... by the check-out. Unfortunately one of the toys they had set out was a car on a hill. Why they would put that in front of a rack is beyond me. Luckily Liam put the brakes on his accelerating Radio Flyer before he hit the rack. Meanwhile the cashier decided to stop helping her current customer just to get rid of me and take my phone # to look for the lost cell phone.
Here's the mia culpa. After all those times of refusing to panic and thinking myself a calm individual. After all of those times of specifically not rushing to conclusions over lost items ("It was stolen!"). After all of the lost blue tooths, which don't even phase me anymore by the way. After all of this I completely lost myself. Over a cell phone.
And as I resigned myself to this loss in my life, I saw a blinking light and shiny black surface underneath the back end of my car. I saw my cell phone. So naturally, I had Liam sprawl himself out on the parking lot pavement (perfectly safe, I assure you) to retrieve my lost cell phone.
So that panic of losing the keys is never too far away from any of us, I think. At least none of us with big, full purses. I think I lose my keys about as often as my mother did. The difference is I don't ask my teenage daughter, "Where are my keys?" I just try to calmly look for them in the purse where they're supposed to be. And sometimes they're not there. Sometimes the keys are in a coat pocket or on the banister. But usually there are the keys, hiding in a dimly lit corner of my purse.
It really came as no surprise to me the other day when I lost my cell phone. I've lost it plenty of times before. Cell phones are no longer those bulky shiny things that used to stretch our pants pockets. No, mine is a cute little Pixi. It's thin, black and unassuming. And that's why I lose it so often. Once I searched everywhere, even had the neighbor calling me, only to find it 15 minutes later on top of the coffee maker (which is also black). So losing it in my fake black Coach bag (I was recently informed- nicely- that it's a fake, just thought I'd be upfront) was no surprise.
I emptied out the contents of the el-cheapo bag I had gotten as a hand-me-down (kind of hoping it was real but not wanting to ask) but to no avail. There was no cell phone in there. I looked in my shopping bags, not there either. I told Liam I was stressed, he didn't seem affected. I informed Liam and Josh we were all going to have to get out of the car and look for the phone together. The kids were already strapped in. As each mother out there knows, once the kids are strapped in, getting out of the car really is not desirable. I mean, the hard work is done, the wrestling is over and it's time to go home. But no, we had to go back to the store.
And go back to the store we did. We went back to both stores, two times each. We retraced steps. We stopped back at stores we hadn't been to, but maybe someone had turned in a cell phone dropped on the sidewalk? I started to panic. I was wearing a winter coat and it was getting very hot. And I was in a complete state of flusteredness. Liam was very cooperative, for a four year old. He even splayed himself flat onto the filthy store floor to look under shelves for the phone. People started to look at me, not out of helpfulness or even pity but out of fear- who is this crazy lady and her wild children? Why does she keep telling her kid, she's a bit stressed? Why didn't she bring her baby in a stroller? Yes, in my infinite wisdom during this wild goose chase, I had decided to carry Joshua instead of pushing him in a stroller. Because apparently taking the extra 3 1/2 minutes to get the stroller... was out of the question. And this was about the time that Joshua decided to practice his butterfly stroke which involved precisely timed, strong kicks with both legs; folding himself in half and pulling my hair. It was lovely.
At one store we stopped in, while I waited in line, I suggested to Liam that he play with some toys I saw set up for... kids... by the check-out. Unfortunately one of the toys they had set out was a car on a hill. Why they would put that in front of a rack is beyond me. Luckily Liam put the brakes on his accelerating Radio Flyer before he hit the rack. Meanwhile the cashier decided to stop helping her current customer just to get rid of me and take my phone # to look for the lost cell phone.
Here's the mia culpa. After all those times of refusing to panic and thinking myself a calm individual. After all of those times of specifically not rushing to conclusions over lost items ("It was stolen!"). After all of the lost blue tooths, which don't even phase me anymore by the way. After all of this I completely lost myself. Over a cell phone.
And as I resigned myself to this loss in my life, I saw a blinking light and shiny black surface underneath the back end of my car. I saw my cell phone. So naturally, I had Liam sprawl himself out on the parking lot pavement (perfectly safe, I assure you) to retrieve my lost cell phone.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Is Also a Thief
Teenagers don't snuggle with their parents... they refuse to give a mom or dad a hug on their way out to school and I'm pretty sure a kiss on the cheek is out of the question. And because teens don't show affection to their parents, I"m pretty sure pre-teens don't either (because they're trying to be cool, like teens). Add on to that the fact that I'm a mother of two boys and we end up with this sad but likely scenario that my days of getting hugs, kisses and cuddles may very well be numbered. I mean, we're pretty much talking about 4-6 more years of hugging, kissing and cuddling with my kids. I'd hope for more because Josh is still so young but he starts off as less of the affectionate kind and also he'll want to emulate his older brother by ignoring his mother, I'm sure.
It's already pretty hard to capture a real cuddle from our kids. True, you can get a good solid hug and even a kiss just by asking... but to get a sit-still-and-cuddle-moment? Those usually have to be stolen. For those of you who are interested in stealing as many cuddles as you can before your kids become pre-teens (or worse... teens), I've compiled a few ideas for places/ways to catch an honest-to-goodness-cuddle.
1) Movie Night- No real reason to hit the theaters; they have armrests which impede a good cuddle. So curl up on your own couch and save some bucks. It's not too much TV if you're right there with them! If it makes you feel better, you can talk about the characters, plot and setting. Now, once you've got your kid in a cuddle, don't move. This might be hard but if you move, they'll get antsy and move farther away from you. And then you're stuck watching Care Bears: The Movie and you're not even getting a cuddle out of it.
2) After a nap- We find that post-nap is a great time for a cuddle because the kids are so groggy!
3) Middle of the night- This isn't the best option if you're looking for an interactive cuddle (i.e. the kid actually enjoying the cuddling with you) but still, that peaceful sleeping face is so sweet. Maybe if you have time you can just lie next to them for a few minutes.
4) Looking at the stars- This isn't just a bad pick-up line anymore... (A friend of mine actually did fall for that line once)... You can use those glow-in-the-dark stars like we did in Liam's room or you could be more realistic/outdoorsy and opt for the real-deal. Either way, make it a nightly ritual to look up at those stars before bedtime. Just try not to fall asleep while looking.
5) In a hammock- This works great because hammocks immediately trap you and your unsuspecting cuddler. Then there's the calming swaying back and forth, back and forth, and the cloud formations to look at too! A great way to steal a good cuddle!
6) Christmas- You know all of that excitement relating to the holiday? Not to mention the fact that your kids will have woken up way too early? Well take advantage of their utter exhaustion, gratitude and euphoria and steal a cuddle at the end of the day. Forget about the dishes- that's what December 26th is for.
7) Anytime you're trying to go somewhere or get something done- Never fails; if you need to get to the store between snack time and dinnertime, it's likely that is when you're kids would prefer to just stay home... cuddling. If you need to do the laundry, guess who would prefer to give Mommy a hug? Have you ever tried to cuddle while emptying the dishwasher? It's not great but you can't be too picky.
8) Storytime- Yes! You've got them trapped with the power of prose! Now steal those cuddles before they squirm away! It really doesn't matter how many times you've read "But Not the Hippopotamus", just read it again and again and again! I suggest interactive books like the lift-the-flap ones for longer sustained reading.
9) Bribery- If it's an emergency and your kids just won't cuddle without "reinforcements", try offering them candy in return for a cuddle. Or if you don't like bribery but you aren't averse to trickery, give them a slow-to-finish candy like a lollipop and plop them down on your lap to enjoy. Nice. For an added bonus, give yourself a piece of that candy too.
10) Now here's the best way to steal a cuddle and it doesn't last long so you need to savor it... Cuddle with a newborn baby. They are so unsuspecting, they actually love to cuddle. Think of the warm embrace they've enjoyed for the past 9 months, now isn't that just what they're craving now that they're born? Isn't that why they curl up on your shoulder with their knees bent and feet tucked under? Isn't that why they fall asleep nestled in the nook of an arm? Plus, they need you so really it's the least they can do to cuddle with you. Enjoy the newborn cuddle, it's so sweet and perfect and warm. Enjoy it so much that you can save it up, like in a piggy bank. So when you're looking at your 13 year old sitting in the passenger's seat and he refuses even to give his dear mother a kiss goodbye before school, you can just close your eyes and remember how when he was a newborn, that little guy just needed you so much that he wanted nothing more than to be close to you. And as those days slowly approach for me, I will remember just how much I have loved every kiss, hug and cuddle... even the ones I've stolen.
It's already pretty hard to capture a real cuddle from our kids. True, you can get a good solid hug and even a kiss just by asking... but to get a sit-still-and-cuddle-moment? Those usually have to be stolen. For those of you who are interested in stealing as many cuddles as you can before your kids become pre-teens (or worse... teens), I've compiled a few ideas for places/ways to catch an honest-to-goodness-cuddle.
1) Movie Night- No real reason to hit the theaters; they have armrests which impede a good cuddle. So curl up on your own couch and save some bucks. It's not too much TV if you're right there with them! If it makes you feel better, you can talk about the characters, plot and setting. Now, once you've got your kid in a cuddle, don't move. This might be hard but if you move, they'll get antsy and move farther away from you. And then you're stuck watching Care Bears: The Movie and you're not even getting a cuddle out of it.
2) After a nap- We find that post-nap is a great time for a cuddle because the kids are so groggy!
3) Middle of the night- This isn't the best option if you're looking for an interactive cuddle (i.e. the kid actually enjoying the cuddling with you) but still, that peaceful sleeping face is so sweet. Maybe if you have time you can just lie next to them for a few minutes.
4) Looking at the stars- This isn't just a bad pick-up line anymore... (A friend of mine actually did fall for that line once)... You can use those glow-in-the-dark stars like we did in Liam's room or you could be more realistic/outdoorsy and opt for the real-deal. Either way, make it a nightly ritual to look up at those stars before bedtime. Just try not to fall asleep while looking.
5) In a hammock- This works great because hammocks immediately trap you and your unsuspecting cuddler. Then there's the calming swaying back and forth, back and forth, and the cloud formations to look at too! A great way to steal a good cuddle!
6) Christmas- You know all of that excitement relating to the holiday? Not to mention the fact that your kids will have woken up way too early? Well take advantage of their utter exhaustion, gratitude and euphoria and steal a cuddle at the end of the day. Forget about the dishes- that's what December 26th is for.
7) Anytime you're trying to go somewhere or get something done- Never fails; if you need to get to the store between snack time and dinnertime, it's likely that is when you're kids would prefer to just stay home... cuddling. If you need to do the laundry, guess who would prefer to give Mommy a hug? Have you ever tried to cuddle while emptying the dishwasher? It's not great but you can't be too picky.
8) Storytime- Yes! You've got them trapped with the power of prose! Now steal those cuddles before they squirm away! It really doesn't matter how many times you've read "But Not the Hippopotamus", just read it again and again and again! I suggest interactive books like the lift-the-flap ones for longer sustained reading.
9) Bribery- If it's an emergency and your kids just won't cuddle without "reinforcements", try offering them candy in return for a cuddle. Or if you don't like bribery but you aren't averse to trickery, give them a slow-to-finish candy like a lollipop and plop them down on your lap to enjoy. Nice. For an added bonus, give yourself a piece of that candy too.
10) Now here's the best way to steal a cuddle and it doesn't last long so you need to savor it... Cuddle with a newborn baby. They are so unsuspecting, they actually love to cuddle. Think of the warm embrace they've enjoyed for the past 9 months, now isn't that just what they're craving now that they're born? Isn't that why they curl up on your shoulder with their knees bent and feet tucked under? Isn't that why they fall asleep nestled in the nook of an arm? Plus, they need you so really it's the least they can do to cuddle with you. Enjoy the newborn cuddle, it's so sweet and perfect and warm. Enjoy it so much that you can save it up, like in a piggy bank. So when you're looking at your 13 year old sitting in the passenger's seat and he refuses even to give his dear mother a kiss goodbye before school, you can just close your eyes and remember how when he was a newborn, that little guy just needed you so much that he wanted nothing more than to be close to you. And as those days slowly approach for me, I will remember just how much I have loved every kiss, hug and cuddle... even the ones I've stolen.
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Yearns for a Sunburn (because that means I've been on the beach and have sat still long enough to lose track of time)
Just looking at the picture made me breath a relaxed sigh. A slight smile came on my face as I looked up from the book to a small group of students in front of me. It was a picture of a beach. Dunes surrounded the page with an image of an empty beach chair begging me to sit down, take a rest, enjoy. There was a matching red & white striped umbrella next to the chair and in front lay endless sea, crashing waves and an eternal sense of happiness and sheer bliss. My students smiled and shared stories about their experiences at a beach- which was the objective of the lesson but also a nice reprieve from our daily grind of skills, practice and assessment. For a short time we were lost in our connections, our memories of happy times spent on the shore. I could feel my feet in the sand, hear the crashing of the waves, sense the pages of a novel between my fingers and the steady warmth of the sun beating down on my skin. I may have even given an audible sigh... until I was brought back to reality.
When was the last time I enjoyed a trip to the beach in this way? When did I allow myself to surrender to the sound of the waves, to forget so much about time that I actually got sun-poisoning (answer: Mexico 2001)? No, the last time I went to the beach it was in New Jersey. We entered the beach through a bar, which would have been promising except for the circumstances. We walked up over the deck and saw the beautiful ocean laid out in front of us... and that's when Liam told me that he couldn't possibly carry his sand toys so I was left to lug all of his shovels and pails and sandcastle molds, with our chairs, and our towels, and our sunscreen, and the umbrella, and somewhere in there (piled at the bottom) my book. We settled in and soon were in the water with Liam. The year before when we went to the ocean, Liam was scared but this time he was much more brave so me & my 9 month pregnant sister decided to go a little deeper- just below waist high. The waves were fun, we jumped and giggled. It was a bit too late before we noticed a gigantic wave that was just about to crash right over our heads and sure enough it did, tossing all three (actually four if you count the baby) of us forward. Now I remember being washed ashore as a kid and hating it but loving it at the same time. Thankfully, that's how Liam felt about the experience (after we got the salt out of his eyes) but me and my sister had a much different feeling about the experience of being trashed by a wave as a mother. For my sister, obviously it was unpleasant and scary but she managed to protect her baby-belly. For me it was highly traumatic- not just during as I thrust Liam as far up and forward as I could, away from the breaking wave so he wouldn't drown. Afterwards I couldn't help but imagine that he had been swept away by the wave into the undertow. You know when you just can't stop thinking of the worst-case-scenario?
What is there to enjoy at the beach if you can't play in the waves? Maybe some sunbathing? And that's about when I realized I was the only female on the beach wearing a "Mom Suit" complete with tankini and matching skirt. Really, everyone (even my pregnant sister) was wearing a bikini. I do own bikinis, it's just that over the years of going to public & community center pools and state park beaches, it's just kind of been beaten out of me. Moms wear mom-suits, not bikinis. Apparently that rule doesn't apply on the New Jersey Shore. Okay so I wasn't going to win best-dressed or sexiest lady on the beach. Once I gave that up, we started looking for shells and clams and I had to keep up with Liam who kept hitting on cute girls (telling them all about who knows what) because he doesn't fully grasp the need for personal space... ever. Plus I sat under an umbrella- that's how I know I'm over 30. I actually sat under an umbrella. And somehow, I still got a sunburn on my shoulder. Ridiculous.
And that was it. Going to the beach wasn't nearly as relaxing as I'd remembered it before I had responsibility over another human being. It just isn't the same anymore. And as that realization hit me, the kids in the small group looked sympathetically toward me and told me that soon enough, Liam & Josh would be old enough to play on their own at the beach. Someday they would run in the waves on their own and build their own sandcastles with the seashells they found without me. But these were shallow reassurances. Because I know these children. I know that their moms have taken them to the beach with full intent of drinking a daiquiri and reading a chapter (just one chapter) in their book only to be handed the boogie board their son couldn't carry by himself, to pick up the sunglasses she dropped as she ran full force into the water, to watch nervously as he jumped fearlessly into a giant crashing wave, to listen to endless nagging about why she couldn't have a virgin daiquiri and whether he could have $ so he could rent one of those cool banana boats or go para sailing. And I know most of their moms probably couldn't even find the bikini (just like me) and here these sweet children were telling me that soon I would get to relax but I totally didn't believe them.
No, there will be no relaxing at a beach anytime soon; at least not without a babysitter and a couple of airline tickets. I might never again pack lightly for the beach. But I am pretty sure next time I go to the Jersey Shore, at the very least, I will pack my bikini (if I can find it).
When was the last time I enjoyed a trip to the beach in this way? When did I allow myself to surrender to the sound of the waves, to forget so much about time that I actually got sun-poisoning (answer: Mexico 2001)? No, the last time I went to the beach it was in New Jersey. We entered the beach through a bar, which would have been promising except for the circumstances. We walked up over the deck and saw the beautiful ocean laid out in front of us... and that's when Liam told me that he couldn't possibly carry his sand toys so I was left to lug all of his shovels and pails and sandcastle molds, with our chairs, and our towels, and our sunscreen, and the umbrella, and somewhere in there (piled at the bottom) my book. We settled in and soon were in the water with Liam. The year before when we went to the ocean, Liam was scared but this time he was much more brave so me & my 9 month pregnant sister decided to go a little deeper- just below waist high. The waves were fun, we jumped and giggled. It was a bit too late before we noticed a gigantic wave that was just about to crash right over our heads and sure enough it did, tossing all three (actually four if you count the baby) of us forward. Now I remember being washed ashore as a kid and hating it but loving it at the same time. Thankfully, that's how Liam felt about the experience (after we got the salt out of his eyes) but me and my sister had a much different feeling about the experience of being trashed by a wave as a mother. For my sister, obviously it was unpleasant and scary but she managed to protect her baby-belly. For me it was highly traumatic- not just during as I thrust Liam as far up and forward as I could, away from the breaking wave so he wouldn't drown. Afterwards I couldn't help but imagine that he had been swept away by the wave into the undertow. You know when you just can't stop thinking of the worst-case-scenario?
What is there to enjoy at the beach if you can't play in the waves? Maybe some sunbathing? And that's about when I realized I was the only female on the beach wearing a "Mom Suit" complete with tankini and matching skirt. Really, everyone (even my pregnant sister) was wearing a bikini. I do own bikinis, it's just that over the years of going to public & community center pools and state park beaches, it's just kind of been beaten out of me. Moms wear mom-suits, not bikinis. Apparently that rule doesn't apply on the New Jersey Shore. Okay so I wasn't going to win best-dressed or sexiest lady on the beach. Once I gave that up, we started looking for shells and clams and I had to keep up with Liam who kept hitting on cute girls (telling them all about who knows what) because he doesn't fully grasp the need for personal space... ever. Plus I sat under an umbrella- that's how I know I'm over 30. I actually sat under an umbrella. And somehow, I still got a sunburn on my shoulder. Ridiculous.
And that was it. Going to the beach wasn't nearly as relaxing as I'd remembered it before I had responsibility over another human being. It just isn't the same anymore. And as that realization hit me, the kids in the small group looked sympathetically toward me and told me that soon enough, Liam & Josh would be old enough to play on their own at the beach. Someday they would run in the waves on their own and build their own sandcastles with the seashells they found without me. But these were shallow reassurances. Because I know these children. I know that their moms have taken them to the beach with full intent of drinking a daiquiri and reading a chapter (just one chapter) in their book only to be handed the boogie board their son couldn't carry by himself, to pick up the sunglasses she dropped as she ran full force into the water, to watch nervously as he jumped fearlessly into a giant crashing wave, to listen to endless nagging about why she couldn't have a virgin daiquiri and whether he could have $ so he could rent one of those cool banana boats or go para sailing. And I know most of their moms probably couldn't even find the bikini (just like me) and here these sweet children were telling me that soon I would get to relax but I totally didn't believe them.
No, there will be no relaxing at a beach anytime soon; at least not without a babysitter and a couple of airline tickets. I might never again pack lightly for the beach. But I am pretty sure next time I go to the Jersey Shore, at the very least, I will pack my bikini (if I can find it).
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Reached A New Level Of Uber-Efficiency
All before lunch today, my kids & I got a workout, worked on a much-dreaded chore, had playtime, spent time outdoors, got tired out (for some of us to have a nap), took care of the poison ivy problem behind the fence, learned first-hand about teamwork and also had a science lesson. Actually, this was all accomplished in about 1 1/2 hours. What did we do to accomplish so much? We raked leaves.
I'm not sure if it's good or bad but I seem to be incapable of just letting my kids play. Actually, that's not true, we do plenty of that (during the summer) but now I am in uber-efficiency mode because it's the school year and I know that each minute of every nap counts. There's no way I'm going to use up precious naptime for something as grueling as exercise and I've learned my lesson about exercising just for the sake of exercising while the kids are awake. And as for chores, same thing! It's not that I'm lazy during nap time. Quite the opposite. Most weekends I bring home a suitcase of schoolwork home and a to-do list that would have been hard to accomplish even if I didn't have kids. Plus, I need to watch all those shows I DVR'd throughout the week. So no, I wouldn't waste a good naptime for doing the dishes. Not when I can make it a family event!
So today we went outside with the pure intention of playing (and tiring the kids out so I could do schoolwork during their nap). But there they were... the dreaded leaves. We've had our fun with them but now they're turning our lawn yellow. Now to truly trick children into helping you, you need to just start working. It doesn't hurt to have two of the same size rakes. Today I tried to get Joshua to use a third rake, which was only about 1 foot long and plastic (a sandbox toy). He wasn't buying it and insisted on using my rake, which got him a bit frustrated. Now when a little helper gets frustrated, it's best to drop everything and distract them with something fun (i.e. jumping into a leaf pile) and then incorporate your work into it (i/e. raking leaves on top of the child). So we did this and before I knew it we were all back in the work-mode. Meanwhile Liam and I had a great conversation about how if we put our piles together and raked them at about the same time, we could move the pile much faster. Then we used our two rakes to "sandwich" the leaves and toss them over the fence. Some people like to burn their leaves and more civilized people put them into neat paper bags by the curb for the town to pick up. But we have a poison ivy problem on the other side of the fence so I prefer to dump all the leaves to smother out our little "issue" on the other side of the fence. While we were working in uber-productive mode, Liam informed me that leaves can make new trees. Serious misinformation but we had time to chat so I explained that acorns make new trees but leaves make food. He then told me that if you look with a microscope at a leaf, you can see the stored food. I explained it a little bit more to him and there you go, we had a hands-on science lesson! On our way inside, we stopped to inspect other trees whose leaves were turning colors and to discuss the evergreen on our front walkway.
Multi-tasking with kids doesn't have to end with leaf raking. We often multi-task with laundry too. First, we all end up with clean clothes but then matching socks is educational, right? Not to mention the exercise of making Liam run up & down stairs to put his clothes away in the correct drawers (or the exercise of an out of shape mother doing laundry circuits up and down the stairs). Baking involves measurement, a special treat for mom & dad, a reading activity and when it's all done it makes you look like a great hostess because... you actually baked! But a word of caution- it's probably a good idea to read the recipe before you start since reading while helping a child crack an egg into the badder is... a bit challenging. Once I forgot to read the directions and we ended up with zucchini bread with the seeds still in it. And what about the multi-tasking of playdates? A day for kids to play while their moms and/or dads hang out near the playground (okay, that's just a pipe dream- usually we end up on the same playground, true, but darting from this piece of equipment to that, catching each other's children and sliding down the slide in compromising positions).
Of course, multi-tasking can have it's poor side effects. Like it could end up breaking your vacuum. Or result in making sub-standard baked goods.
Being so good at multi-tasking, one would think I would keep an immaculate house and that I would be on top of my entire to-do list. If you think that, than you haven't visited my house unannounced lately or seen my to-do list. No, my house is far from clean. The leaves that blew into the house via the back porch last weekend... they're still there. And the sink full of dishes, it's still full (to be fair, no matter how often I load & unload the dishwasher, it does just seem like more dishes are waiting to be cleaned). Maybe if we had $ for a maid but I'm pretty sure they're expensive and I'm too stubborn to pay someone to vacuum my house. And maybe I would be able to stay on top of things if I didn't bring home such a full bag every night and weekend, hoping to expend every extra sliver of energy during nap or after bedtime to do schoolwork. So for now, multi-tasking isn't just for fun, exercise or a chance to bond with my family. It's really a matter of survival! So for now we'll keep multi-tasking; like having family night at the grocery store...
P.S. Does anyone know how to spell "uber". I think I spelled it wrong.
I'm not sure if it's good or bad but I seem to be incapable of just letting my kids play. Actually, that's not true, we do plenty of that (during the summer) but now I am in uber-efficiency mode because it's the school year and I know that each minute of every nap counts. There's no way I'm going to use up precious naptime for something as grueling as exercise and I've learned my lesson about exercising just for the sake of exercising while the kids are awake. And as for chores, same thing! It's not that I'm lazy during nap time. Quite the opposite. Most weekends I bring home a suitcase of schoolwork home and a to-do list that would have been hard to accomplish even if I didn't have kids. Plus, I need to watch all those shows I DVR'd throughout the week. So no, I wouldn't waste a good naptime for doing the dishes. Not when I can make it a family event!
So today we went outside with the pure intention of playing (and tiring the kids out so I could do schoolwork during their nap). But there they were... the dreaded leaves. We've had our fun with them but now they're turning our lawn yellow. Now to truly trick children into helping you, you need to just start working. It doesn't hurt to have two of the same size rakes. Today I tried to get Joshua to use a third rake, which was only about 1 foot long and plastic (a sandbox toy). He wasn't buying it and insisted on using my rake, which got him a bit frustrated. Now when a little helper gets frustrated, it's best to drop everything and distract them with something fun (i.e. jumping into a leaf pile) and then incorporate your work into it (i/e. raking leaves on top of the child). So we did this and before I knew it we were all back in the work-mode. Meanwhile Liam and I had a great conversation about how if we put our piles together and raked them at about the same time, we could move the pile much faster. Then we used our two rakes to "sandwich" the leaves and toss them over the fence. Some people like to burn their leaves and more civilized people put them into neat paper bags by the curb for the town to pick up. But we have a poison ivy problem on the other side of the fence so I prefer to dump all the leaves to smother out our little "issue" on the other side of the fence. While we were working in uber-productive mode, Liam informed me that leaves can make new trees. Serious misinformation but we had time to chat so I explained that acorns make new trees but leaves make food. He then told me that if you look with a microscope at a leaf, you can see the stored food. I explained it a little bit more to him and there you go, we had a hands-on science lesson! On our way inside, we stopped to inspect other trees whose leaves were turning colors and to discuss the evergreen on our front walkway.
Multi-tasking with kids doesn't have to end with leaf raking. We often multi-task with laundry too. First, we all end up with clean clothes but then matching socks is educational, right? Not to mention the exercise of making Liam run up & down stairs to put his clothes away in the correct drawers (or the exercise of an out of shape mother doing laundry circuits up and down the stairs). Baking involves measurement, a special treat for mom & dad, a reading activity and when it's all done it makes you look like a great hostess because... you actually baked! But a word of caution- it's probably a good idea to read the recipe before you start since reading while helping a child crack an egg into the badder is... a bit challenging. Once I forgot to read the directions and we ended up with zucchini bread with the seeds still in it. And what about the multi-tasking of playdates? A day for kids to play while their moms and/or dads hang out near the playground (okay, that's just a pipe dream- usually we end up on the same playground, true, but darting from this piece of equipment to that, catching each other's children and sliding down the slide in compromising positions).
Of course, multi-tasking can have it's poor side effects. Like it could end up breaking your vacuum. Or result in making sub-standard baked goods.
Being so good at multi-tasking, one would think I would keep an immaculate house and that I would be on top of my entire to-do list. If you think that, than you haven't visited my house unannounced lately or seen my to-do list. No, my house is far from clean. The leaves that blew into the house via the back porch last weekend... they're still there. And the sink full of dishes, it's still full (to be fair, no matter how often I load & unload the dishwasher, it does just seem like more dishes are waiting to be cleaned). Maybe if we had $ for a maid but I'm pretty sure they're expensive and I'm too stubborn to pay someone to vacuum my house. And maybe I would be able to stay on top of things if I didn't bring home such a full bag every night and weekend, hoping to expend every extra sliver of energy during nap or after bedtime to do schoolwork. So for now, multi-tasking isn't just for fun, exercise or a chance to bond with my family. It's really a matter of survival! So for now we'll keep multi-tasking; like having family night at the grocery store...
P.S. Does anyone know how to spell "uber". I think I spelled it wrong.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Has a Secret Hiding in the Closet
I'd like to introduce you to Frank. Frank spends most of his time in our hallway closet. He's our vacuum. I've decided to call him Frank because he truly is the Frankenstein of vacuums. Frank and I have been through a lot. I've appreciated his wheels when I've had to lug the canister up and down the hallway while carrying a baby. Frank is the perfect height to fit under our coffee table to vacuum up stray Cheerios. And really, as much as I complain about vacuuming the stairs (truly my least favorite of all household chores- except for doing the garbage, that's just horrible- mostly because I"m lazy and don't want to go outside), it's really not so bad with my trusty canister vacuum.
Now over the years, Frank has become a bit decrepit. Right now he's literally held together with duct tape. This is due to an unfortunate incident where I thought it would be a good idea to involve both boys in vacuuming. So I had Liam vacuuming with Joshua riding the canister (did I mention this was my idea) and was actually slightly surprised when the hose came off of the canister. Bill taped it back on but it hasn't quite been the same since. This would have been devastating if (1) it wasn't already considered a decrepit vacuum cleaner or (2) if I actually thought it couldn't be fixed and would have to immediately buy a vacuum. Instead we've been using the taped together vacuum for the last 4 months. Before the unfortunate riding-on-the-vacuum incident, we had our fair share of vacuum mishaps. The plug came off of the cord (but it cost only about $1.50 to fix with a new plug and a Handy-Manny-Husband- without the accent or talking tools). Joshua likes to steal the light cover on the vacuum head and has stolen it so many times that I just stopped putting the cover back on (in fact, I think the cover is in his toy box right now). Liam was vacuuming the stairs last week (I know, you're thinking about what a genius I am, getting my son to do my second least favorite chore for me) and kept screaming over the vacuum cleaner attachment: "It keeps falling off!" And I couldn't help but wonder, why would they make a vacuum cleaner attachment with a removable brush anyway?
A few years ago Bill bought me a new vacuum for Christmas. There it was, a brand new upright vacuum cleaner. He thought he was hilarious, buying such a useful gift for Christmas. But after looking up its ratings on Consumer Reports, we returned that one with the expectation of buying a new one with better ratings. That was 2 years ago (or maybe 3?).
I'm really not in too much too much of a hurry anyway. It seems like every time I shop for new vacuums there are new features which seem so appealing- like Hepa Filters & extending vacuum hoses! If I wait long enough, there could be a such thing as a vacuum that vacuums stairs without my assistance (think of the Roomba Helicopter). I'm really glad we didn't keep that upright anyway- last time I shopped for vacuums I picked up one of those uprights and they were so much heavier than Frank! If I thought vacuuming the stairs with Frank was a chore, imagine it with an upright! That was a close call! For now, I think I'll just continue to hide Frank in the closet. I'll just continue to tell people that we didn't vacuum... just so they don't get their expectations too high.
Now over the years, Frank has become a bit decrepit. Right now he's literally held together with duct tape. This is due to an unfortunate incident where I thought it would be a good idea to involve both boys in vacuuming. So I had Liam vacuuming with Joshua riding the canister (did I mention this was my idea) and was actually slightly surprised when the hose came off of the canister. Bill taped it back on but it hasn't quite been the same since. This would have been devastating if (1) it wasn't already considered a decrepit vacuum cleaner or (2) if I actually thought it couldn't be fixed and would have to immediately buy a vacuum. Instead we've been using the taped together vacuum for the last 4 months. Before the unfortunate riding-on-the-vacuum incident, we had our fair share of vacuum mishaps. The plug came off of the cord (but it cost only about $1.50 to fix with a new plug and a Handy-Manny-Husband- without the accent or talking tools). Joshua likes to steal the light cover on the vacuum head and has stolen it so many times that I just stopped putting the cover back on (in fact, I think the cover is in his toy box right now). Liam was vacuuming the stairs last week (I know, you're thinking about what a genius I am, getting my son to do my second least favorite chore for me) and kept screaming over the vacuum cleaner attachment: "It keeps falling off!" And I couldn't help but wonder, why would they make a vacuum cleaner attachment with a removable brush anyway?
A few years ago Bill bought me a new vacuum for Christmas. There it was, a brand new upright vacuum cleaner. He thought he was hilarious, buying such a useful gift for Christmas. But after looking up its ratings on Consumer Reports, we returned that one with the expectation of buying a new one with better ratings. That was 2 years ago (or maybe 3?).
I'm really not in too much too much of a hurry anyway. It seems like every time I shop for new vacuums there are new features which seem so appealing- like Hepa Filters & extending vacuum hoses! If I wait long enough, there could be a such thing as a vacuum that vacuums stairs without my assistance (think of the Roomba Helicopter). I'm really glad we didn't keep that upright anyway- last time I shopped for vacuums I picked up one of those uprights and they were so much heavier than Frank! If I thought vacuuming the stairs with Frank was a chore, imagine it with an upright! That was a close call! For now, I think I'll just continue to hide Frank in the closet. I'll just continue to tell people that we didn't vacuum... just so they don't get their expectations too high.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Has Sticky Fingers
I went trick or treating when I was in high school. I admit it. One year in high school (yes, I actually went trick or treating in high school more than once) we knocked on the door of this beautiful house across the street from our school and I couldn't help but comment, "I think your house is so beautiful, I always look out the window during class at your house." So did the homeowner look at me oddly because I was stalking his house or because I just gave away my age? Who knows. To be fair, I was a Halloween purist. I didn't believe in pranks or anything like that. I was really out because I just loved to dress up (I was a circus that year, the next year I was a cowgirl) and go house to house getting candy. I don't even remember liking the candy, more just the walking around in the dark with friends. We could have been unruly, we just chose not to.
Apparently the new tradition in my house is converting the basement to a haunted house. We spent one afternoon as a family setting up the haunted house. We hid monsters in the Bat Cave, taped spiders to the Thomas trains and made a series of tunnels using ... tunnels and blankets. Meanwhile Joshua walked around behind us putting Batman and Robin on the train tracks, walking around with the brain from Ned's Head and pulling down every blanket, tassel and piece of toilet paper he could wrap his fingers around.
Years past between my later high school years, college years and young adulthood before Halloween was able to regain its excitement. I once tried sitting on my boyfriend's (now hubbie's) porch doing my coursework while passing out candy to young children. None came. Just a handful of big kids. I dressed up in my cowgirl costume going to college parties where all of the other girls were dressed as Superwoman and french maids. Once I got my teaching job, Halloween took on a whole different meaning- loud parties with swarms of people clogging the school hallways... I barely had any energy for Halloween after that- not that it mattered because still, all we got at our door were a few big kids with pillowcases.
Imagine my excitement when I had kids of my own. Kids who love candy and any excuse to get more candy. Imagine the thrill of getting to walk around at night again, chat with neighbors and collect Twix bars... Mmmm... And so, Halloween has become a spectacle once again. I have an excuse to make a Halloween costume again. Just like when I was a kid and got the big idea to be a Cheerio box (and then painted the box all by myself) or a pizza (another of my creations, complete with a pizza cutter), now as a parent I get to concoct these crazy costuming schemes. Usually it goes something like this: I get a costume at a garage sale and then convince Liam that that's what he wants to be. I mean, seriously, one year I found him a fire fighter's rain coat complete with hat. That's awesome! It was a dual function costume for heaven's sake! Last year I found Joshua's costume (a shark- seriously I didn't think anything could be as cute as a baby lobster costume, but this was) so I convinced Liam to be a surfer. This year Joshua's hand-me-down was a dinosaur but I decided that it was a dragon and "quickly convinced" (that means strong-armed) Liam to be a wizard. Only, there didn't seem to be any wizard costumes for less than $10 anywhere I looked. I almost gave up and allowed him to be an astronaut. I had him try on my bathrobe & his bathrobe but neither worked. I returned to the craft store for the second night in a row and eventually settled on a shiny fabric for at 50% off a yard. It still came to over $12 but as a poncho with a witch hat and my Suma Cum Laud (wouldn't it be really ironic if I spelled that wrong, in fact, I'm not going to even look up the correct spelling) rope tassel thingies he does look a bit like a wizard. As a finishing touch we went with a white felt beard. Only who knew that felt can't be glued together... so I just spent 20 minutes sewing glued felt together. My hands are still sticky.Apparently the new tradition in my house is converting the basement to a haunted house. We spent one afternoon as a family setting up the haunted house. We hid monsters in the Bat Cave, taped spiders to the Thomas trains and made a series of tunnels using ... tunnels and blankets. Meanwhile Joshua walked around behind us putting Batman and Robin on the train tracks, walking around with the brain from Ned's Head and pulling down every blanket, tassel and piece of toilet paper he could wrap his fingers around.
Halloween. It's one of those holidays with hidden (and not so hidden) costs a not-so-perfect crafter's nightmare. A holiday where it's not enough to make macaroni & cheese- you have to make it in muffin tins with olive eyes and spinach legs (swamp creatures) or plain chicken- it's got to be chicken fingers, of course! It's a holiday of cupcakes, candy corn, popcorn balls and apple cider donuts (I swear I heard a kid in school today say, "I just ate so much candy, I think I'm diabetic"). It's a holiday where licensed characters roam around your neighborhood (think of the Power Rangers, Thomas the Train and Tigger walking hand-in-hand). And yet, if for just one hour on Halloween night I get to pull my two guys in our spooked-out Halloween wagon and we get to walk through a couple of cemeteries on the way to a neighbor's front door on a crisp fall evening... well, that just brings me back to the good old days (when I was back in high school).
Friday, October 15, 2010
Had a Crappy Day
Today I went to school with poop on my shirt. I mean, I walked into my place of business with human poop on my shirt. Seriously? Really? Have I reached an all-time low of lack of hygiene? Yes. No really, it was an unpredictable incident considering that Josh is way past the stage of leaky diapers. I changed his diaper this morning and I did notice that his clothes needed to be changed so I gave him a new pair of jeans & a new shirt. But what about my clothes? I was in too much of a rush to notice that when I picked him up, he must have leaked a little onto my shirt too.
This wasn't all bad news though. Actually from here the day did start improving- I mean really, when you hit an all-time low like seeing poop on your shirt when you're standing in your workplace bathroom, it really can only go uphill from there, right? So first I consider it a blessing that I noticed the poop rather than some child exclaiming, "What smells like crap?" and then realizing it would be me... their teacher. And let's say a child didn't notice it- today was parent teacher conference day- so I'm very appreciative that it wasn't a parent who caught a whiff of my poopy shirt. So this was all good because, first of all, I recognized the problem. Then it got even better. Several colleagues are participating in an upcoming Making Strides event and we were supposed to wear our team t-shirts today. Oh wonderful! Now I had an excuse not to wear my poopy shirt! And thankfully I had not had the foresight to take the Making Strides t-shirt home (to wash it) before the event! It was sitting right there by my desk! So I changed into the Making Strides shirt and used the opportunity to wash my other shirt. There was even time to dry it on the air vent. I didn't even get any questions from the kids- "Why is your shirt sitting on the air vent?" Because kids don't ever really notice things like that (in fact, it's not uncommon for me to find one of their go-gurt containers laying on the floor after school or glue toppled over and leaking onto counters or anything significant like that so why would they notice a t-shirt on the air vent?). By the time parent teacher conferences came around this afternoon, my shirt was freshly dried and it didn't have that poopy scent either (thanks to copious amounts of anti-bacterial soap- seriously, I think I cleaned that shirt better than my washing machine would have)!
The morale of the story is this... never trust your baby not to poop on you. This goes for infants as well as toddlers. Maybe even preschoolers. Just when you least expect it, they will poop on your shirt or worse- in the bathtub. Your baby does love you but that will still not stop him/her from pooping on you when you let your guard down. In the event that you do get pooped on, it would be a good idea to have an extra shirt at work, or at least some Febreeze. For me, I consider getting pooped on just one of those things working moms deal with. Okay, to be fair most working moms probably get away with never having their business suits soiled but me, I'm just not one of those moms so just to be sure, I think I'll keep the extra t-shirt in my bottom drawer.
This wasn't all bad news though. Actually from here the day did start improving- I mean really, when you hit an all-time low like seeing poop on your shirt when you're standing in your workplace bathroom, it really can only go uphill from there, right? So first I consider it a blessing that I noticed the poop rather than some child exclaiming, "What smells like crap?" and then realizing it would be me... their teacher. And let's say a child didn't notice it- today was parent teacher conference day- so I'm very appreciative that it wasn't a parent who caught a whiff of my poopy shirt. So this was all good because, first of all, I recognized the problem. Then it got even better. Several colleagues are participating in an upcoming Making Strides event and we were supposed to wear our team t-shirts today. Oh wonderful! Now I had an excuse not to wear my poopy shirt! And thankfully I had not had the foresight to take the Making Strides t-shirt home (to wash it) before the event! It was sitting right there by my desk! So I changed into the Making Strides shirt and used the opportunity to wash my other shirt. There was even time to dry it on the air vent. I didn't even get any questions from the kids- "Why is your shirt sitting on the air vent?" Because kids don't ever really notice things like that (in fact, it's not uncommon for me to find one of their go-gurt containers laying on the floor after school or glue toppled over and leaking onto counters or anything significant like that so why would they notice a t-shirt on the air vent?). By the time parent teacher conferences came around this afternoon, my shirt was freshly dried and it didn't have that poopy scent either (thanks to copious amounts of anti-bacterial soap- seriously, I think I cleaned that shirt better than my washing machine would have)!
The morale of the story is this... never trust your baby not to poop on you. This goes for infants as well as toddlers. Maybe even preschoolers. Just when you least expect it, they will poop on your shirt or worse- in the bathtub. Your baby does love you but that will still not stop him/her from pooping on you when you let your guard down. In the event that you do get pooped on, it would be a good idea to have an extra shirt at work, or at least some Febreeze. For me, I consider getting pooped on just one of those things working moms deal with. Okay, to be fair most working moms probably get away with never having their business suits soiled but me, I'm just not one of those moms so just to be sure, I think I'll keep the extra t-shirt in my bottom drawer.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Is Done With Mommy & Me Yoga!
Several months ago Bill & I decided that our scale was broken. We promptly threw it away and it hasn't been replaced since. Ever since I have been living the sweet life of ignoring when my pants snap open in public, eating popcorn covered in parmesan cheese right before bed and generally stalking the faculty room for snacks. But it has caught up to me, I suppose. The evil doctor's office scale with it's 4 pound overages (at least that's what Bill claims), the aforementioned pants that refuse to cooperate by staying snapped and the fact that my mom jeans seem to be filling out in the gut area... So it may be time to exercise... I suppose.
Previous attempts at exercise have not gone well since I've had kids. Well, to be fair, I did enjoy the Mommy & Me yoga class I took with Liam when he was an infant but it's really all gone downhill since then. I enjoy yoga as much as the next person but I do not enjoy downward facing dog while having my hair pulled by a baby and having a four year old try to climb over Mommy Mountain. Likewise, it's equally uncomfortable in upwards facing dog with two kids sitting on your back. And doing the boat pose with Josh sitting "in the boat" (pretty much on my belly while I try to keep my legs bent at the knee and feet levitating) is also not so fun. I've tried other more fun workouts like the Bollywood dancing. It just ends up a massive flurry of scarves and then Liam complains that the music "isn't rock and roll enough". The Family Walk program is met with the least possible amount of enthusiasm.
So exercising with children is out. Which leaves the early morning hours. HAH! Conveniently, however, with Liam's preschool at the community center, we also have a membership to the gym, classes & pool (this wasn't really an option and we do have to pay for it, so it's less of a perk and more of a necessity). Being extremely cheap, I feel it's our job to make use of this gym membership and in doing so to hopefully encourage the snap on my pants to stay closed (unless it's a defective snap, that is possible, right?).
After 4 months of membership, I went to my first yoga class this past week. Literally, my first yoga class ever (besides the Mommy & Me class but that class involved babies sleeping, simple stretches and nursing whenever baby was hungry). And because the world is hilarious like that, the only spot available for me was in the front. So not only did everyone get to see my lack of balance and grace, I also got to see it face front in the mirror. Now on my way to yoga I thought to myself that I didn't care what this instructor asked us to do (the wheel, pigeon or chair... bring it on) as long as there were no babies, toddlers or preschoolers looming about. True, I was able to do a downward facing dog without having my leg pulled out from under me, but then who was to blame when I struggled to keep my balance in airplane pose? And where were my scapegoats when I found that doing the wheel was simply not an option for me and I needed a break (okay, I'll take a break from this grueling yoga practice to get you a cookie)?
Needless to say, this might be the push I need to get myself back in shape. I'm not a lazy person but I admit to lately preferring a Cheetoh over an apple. But it's about time for me to get back to reality. True, it takes guns of steel to shred cheese while holding a 25 pound clingy child... but apparently that doesn't help tone my jelly belly. So for now, I think I will wake up at the silly early hour of 5:30 am so I can squeeze in a workout before the day begins. And maybe... just maybe... in a few weeks in class I'll be able to graduate from the 2 pound weights (yes, laugh at me) to the 4 pound ones! And maybe I'll even be able to do the tree pose while leaning to one side with my weight held over my head... without falling over. But just in case, I think next time I'll leave the kids a few minutes earlier to get a spot in the back...
Previous attempts at exercise have not gone well since I've had kids. Well, to be fair, I did enjoy the Mommy & Me yoga class I took with Liam when he was an infant but it's really all gone downhill since then. I enjoy yoga as much as the next person but I do not enjoy downward facing dog while having my hair pulled by a baby and having a four year old try to climb over Mommy Mountain. Likewise, it's equally uncomfortable in upwards facing dog with two kids sitting on your back. And doing the boat pose with Josh sitting "in the boat" (pretty much on my belly while I try to keep my legs bent at the knee and feet levitating) is also not so fun. I've tried other more fun workouts like the Bollywood dancing. It just ends up a massive flurry of scarves and then Liam complains that the music "isn't rock and roll enough". The Family Walk program is met with the least possible amount of enthusiasm.
So exercising with children is out. Which leaves the early morning hours. HAH! Conveniently, however, with Liam's preschool at the community center, we also have a membership to the gym, classes & pool (this wasn't really an option and we do have to pay for it, so it's less of a perk and more of a necessity). Being extremely cheap, I feel it's our job to make use of this gym membership and in doing so to hopefully encourage the snap on my pants to stay closed (unless it's a defective snap, that is possible, right?).
After 4 months of membership, I went to my first yoga class this past week. Literally, my first yoga class ever (besides the Mommy & Me class but that class involved babies sleeping, simple stretches and nursing whenever baby was hungry). And because the world is hilarious like that, the only spot available for me was in the front. So not only did everyone get to see my lack of balance and grace, I also got to see it face front in the mirror. Now on my way to yoga I thought to myself that I didn't care what this instructor asked us to do (the wheel, pigeon or chair... bring it on) as long as there were no babies, toddlers or preschoolers looming about. True, I was able to do a downward facing dog without having my leg pulled out from under me, but then who was to blame when I struggled to keep my balance in airplane pose? And where were my scapegoats when I found that doing the wheel was simply not an option for me and I needed a break (okay, I'll take a break from this grueling yoga practice to get you a cookie)?
Needless to say, this might be the push I need to get myself back in shape. I'm not a lazy person but I admit to lately preferring a Cheetoh over an apple. But it's about time for me to get back to reality. True, it takes guns of steel to shred cheese while holding a 25 pound clingy child... but apparently that doesn't help tone my jelly belly. So for now, I think I will wake up at the silly early hour of 5:30 am so I can squeeze in a workout before the day begins. And maybe... just maybe... in a few weeks in class I'll be able to graduate from the 2 pound weights (yes, laugh at me) to the 4 pound ones! And maybe I'll even be able to do the tree pose while leaning to one side with my weight held over my head... without falling over. But just in case, I think next time I'll leave the kids a few minutes earlier to get a spot in the back...
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Attempts to Offer Advice to the New Mommies Out There!
This weekend I went to see my sister and her new baby. He turned two weeks old and has at least a month left of that newborn status where he gets to look around the world with hazy eyes and (my favorite part) curl up onto a warm shoulder to take a nap. Soon enough she/he'll be a round, bright eyed baby squirming to get wherever he wants to go and babbling to say whatever is on his/her mind! And so in honor of this brand new baby in the family, I have a few words of advice to any new mother or any mother who has older kids & may have forgotten about the baby stages already (like I did before this weekend)...
(1) Keep the diaper on the baby at all times. If you take a diaper off, you risk immediate peril to your fluffy slippers, leather couch and/or white carpet.
(2) Relating to #1- When you are holding a naked baby and you say, "He/She is peeing on me!" You better hope that it's pee.
(3) Don't expect any clothing to actually fit your newborn baby. Even the newborn sizes don't fit newborn babies.
(4) Baby toys are useless. If the package says anything below 3 months, you can just laugh about it and save yourself the $12.
(5) Relating to #4- I don't think any baby I've ever met has actually liked having a rattle on their socks, mittens or wrists.
(6) Many people say that when your baby sleeps, you should sleep but I disagree. While taking a nap with baby is the pure definition of bliss... if you're not holding the baby you may want to consider one of the following options during his/her short nap: (a) Take a shower; it's 3 pm! or (b) Do the dishes; your husband is more likely to cook dinner for you when he gets home if the sink is empty.
(7) If you're wondering where to put the baby when you're not holding him, this is where either one of those 3 bouncy seats you have put together would come in handy or where it would be handy to have a carpeted floor, a blanket and no animals in the house (in my experience, animals tend to steal binkies... but then again when I had my first baby our animal in the house was a ferret).
(8) If you get your baby a cute matchy outfit (ie pants, shirt, jacket, hat, booties, etc...) expect only 2/3 of the outfit to fit. Clearly some outfits are cuter on the hanger but never expected to actually be worn (think of it kind of like those super sexy numbers in Victoria's Secret).
(9) Relating to #8- It might be awhile before you can walk into a Victoria's Secret without feeling "awkward"- particularly if you're walking into Victoria's Secret (a) Looking for a nursing bra (b) With a stroller and/or (c) In bleach-stained baggy sweats (because they're the only thing that fit).
(10) If you are a klutz, like this Worst Best Mom Ever, than you may want to constantly dress your baby with a cute, padded hat. That way when you walk too close to the door frame, baby won't get hurt.
(11) Baths can really be relaxing for babies... and the baby will be naked... so expect the unexpected while bathing the baby. And often times (if you have a boy), the unexpected will come in a rather large arch so you may want to clear off whatever is around the sink or tub before bathing baby.
(12) For the baby's first doctor's appointment, you should bring two extra changes of clothing for the baby... and an extra change of clothes for yourself too (again, since doctor's visits include baby nudity).
(13) Consider pictures your baby might regret when he/she gets older (nudity & cross dressing to be specific). Then decide if that means you want to avoid taking the picture or perhaps take more pictures just like it.
(14) Cadbury eggs might keep you from going crazy.
(15) I think I made this one up when I had my first baby- "Everything works sometimes and sometimes nothing works". Then I had my second baby and he taught me that "Often times anything works". So in conclusion, I guess that just means that you can toss out all of the advice (#s1-14) anyone ever gives you and just follow your instinct.
Okay and just to wrap it up... here's the worst advice we ever received upon becoming parents... Actually, Bill received the advice and I really doubt he ever followed it...
*Wait 2 weeks to taste the breast milk. And when you do taste it, try it in your coffee!
And now, in a shameless effort to encourage others to comment!!! What is your advice to a new mommy? And I don't mean that cheesy advice that you give people for that game at the baby shower, I mean your real-life advice!
(1) Keep the diaper on the baby at all times. If you take a diaper off, you risk immediate peril to your fluffy slippers, leather couch and/or white carpet.
(2) Relating to #1- When you are holding a naked baby and you say, "He/She is peeing on me!" You better hope that it's pee.
(3) Don't expect any clothing to actually fit your newborn baby. Even the newborn sizes don't fit newborn babies.
(4) Baby toys are useless. If the package says anything below 3 months, you can just laugh about it and save yourself the $12.
(5) Relating to #4- I don't think any baby I've ever met has actually liked having a rattle on their socks, mittens or wrists.
(6) Many people say that when your baby sleeps, you should sleep but I disagree. While taking a nap with baby is the pure definition of bliss... if you're not holding the baby you may want to consider one of the following options during his/her short nap: (a) Take a shower; it's 3 pm! or (b) Do the dishes; your husband is more likely to cook dinner for you when he gets home if the sink is empty.
(7) If you're wondering where to put the baby when you're not holding him, this is where either one of those 3 bouncy seats you have put together would come in handy or where it would be handy to have a carpeted floor, a blanket and no animals in the house (in my experience, animals tend to steal binkies... but then again when I had my first baby our animal in the house was a ferret).
(8) If you get your baby a cute matchy outfit (ie pants, shirt, jacket, hat, booties, etc...) expect only 2/3 of the outfit to fit. Clearly some outfits are cuter on the hanger but never expected to actually be worn (think of it kind of like those super sexy numbers in Victoria's Secret).
(9) Relating to #8- It might be awhile before you can walk into a Victoria's Secret without feeling "awkward"- particularly if you're walking into Victoria's Secret (a) Looking for a nursing bra (b) With a stroller and/or (c) In bleach-stained baggy sweats (because they're the only thing that fit).
(10) If you are a klutz, like this Worst Best Mom Ever, than you may want to constantly dress your baby with a cute, padded hat. That way when you walk too close to the door frame, baby won't get hurt.
(11) Baths can really be relaxing for babies... and the baby will be naked... so expect the unexpected while bathing the baby. And often times (if you have a boy), the unexpected will come in a rather large arch so you may want to clear off whatever is around the sink or tub before bathing baby.
(12) For the baby's first doctor's appointment, you should bring two extra changes of clothing for the baby... and an extra change of clothes for yourself too (again, since doctor's visits include baby nudity).
(13) Consider pictures your baby might regret when he/she gets older (nudity & cross dressing to be specific). Then decide if that means you want to avoid taking the picture or perhaps take more pictures just like it.
(14) Cadbury eggs might keep you from going crazy.
(15) I think I made this one up when I had my first baby- "Everything works sometimes and sometimes nothing works". Then I had my second baby and he taught me that "Often times anything works". So in conclusion, I guess that just means that you can toss out all of the advice (#s1-14) anyone ever gives you and just follow your instinct.
Okay and just to wrap it up... here's the worst advice we ever received upon becoming parents... Actually, Bill received the advice and I really doubt he ever followed it...
*Wait 2 weeks to taste the breast milk. And when you do taste it, try it in your coffee!
And now, in a shameless effort to encourage others to comment!!! What is your advice to a new mommy? And I don't mean that cheesy advice that you give people for that game at the baby shower, I mean your real-life advice!
Monday, October 4, 2010
Has Earned Some Perspective
Perspective comes with age and it can't be rushed. Take, for example, a young person's musical tastes. Liam is perpetually seeking out his own brand of "rock star" music. When he finds it, he breaks into a semi-violent air guitar routine which inevitably ends up knocking him off his own feet and giving me a headache (I have much to look forward to in ten years). One night we were having a family dance party and taking requests. Liam kept saying, "That's not hard enough!" Now my husband was one of those kids who made the whole house shake with his musical choices in high school... so our CD collection is not lacking in hard rock and even some stuff that's so hard it makes my eyes roll back in my head. After Liam kept asking for harder, Bill finally gave in and put on a Napalm Death CD (of course, we didn't tell Liam the name of the band). We were informed that Napalm Death was not hard enough. I suggested Pantera. Still not hard enough for Liam. That's saying quite a lot. I remember the first time I heard Pantera when I was in my teens and just at the sound of it, it made me cry. So when Liam didn't think Pantera was hard enough, we were a bit perplexed. Until Liam said in a disappointed voice, [sigh] "I should have just put on my Chimpunks rock and roll CD." Oh, perspective. That's what he wanted. And while it wasn't exactly "hard" listening to the chipmunks sing "Three Little Birds", that was Liam's perspective on what hard rock and roll really was. So we gladly obliged (but somehow my headache got worse).
Oh perspective. How can I explain to Liam how it's simply not possible that he "loves Christmas more than I love him"? Well, to tell the complete story, he first told me that he loves Christmas more than he loves me. Then to top it off, he told me that his love for Christmas was more than my love for him. Really? How could I change that perspective so that the next day he wouldn't go wandering into his Jewish preschool telling people all about how his love of Christmas supersedes my love for him? I asked him why he loves Christmas. Because of the toys, the fun and the playing is what he said. I thought about why I love Christmas. Because of seeing his joy, eating good food, giving gifts I know people will love, the surprise, the tradition, the food that other people cooked, the snacks, the chocolate- back to topic- the warm cheeks by the fire, the happy music, the feeling of relaxation knowing that it's the beginning of vacation (now I'm fantasizing again). My point in my own head was that his perspective was still so shallow that, while he does appreciate all of those things, he still doesn't find them to be the defining moments of this special family holiday. He just likes the presents and toys and playing. And then the other part- how could he possibly compare my love for him to his love of Christmas? I told him that I loved him way more than I love Christmas but that still didn't seem to sway his opinions. I said, "Liam, you love Christmas way up into the sky, right? Well, I love you deep into the earth." He still didn't get it. Instead he giggled and we digressed into lists of what we loved about each other (with him copying most of what I said and/or stating things he saw in front of him like- as we pulled up to the basketball net in our driveway, "I love you because you let me play basketball").
And the truth is, a love of a human being is far deeper than a love of a special day. And how long will it take for Liam to truly realize the depth of his feelings? And to gain perspective on musical preferences? I'm thinking that we have more hope for the latter and I'm also thinking of getting him some really good headphones for Christmas sometime before he turns 14.
Oh perspective. How can I explain to Liam how it's simply not possible that he "loves Christmas more than I love him"? Well, to tell the complete story, he first told me that he loves Christmas more than he loves me. Then to top it off, he told me that his love for Christmas was more than my love for him. Really? How could I change that perspective so that the next day he wouldn't go wandering into his Jewish preschool telling people all about how his love of Christmas supersedes my love for him? I asked him why he loves Christmas. Because of the toys, the fun and the playing is what he said. I thought about why I love Christmas. Because of seeing his joy, eating good food, giving gifts I know people will love, the surprise, the tradition, the food that other people cooked, the snacks, the chocolate- back to topic- the warm cheeks by the fire, the happy music, the feeling of relaxation knowing that it's the beginning of vacation (now I'm fantasizing again). My point in my own head was that his perspective was still so shallow that, while he does appreciate all of those things, he still doesn't find them to be the defining moments of this special family holiday. He just likes the presents and toys and playing. And then the other part- how could he possibly compare my love for him to his love of Christmas? I told him that I loved him way more than I love Christmas but that still didn't seem to sway his opinions. I said, "Liam, you love Christmas way up into the sky, right? Well, I love you deep into the earth." He still didn't get it. Instead he giggled and we digressed into lists of what we loved about each other (with him copying most of what I said and/or stating things he saw in front of him like- as we pulled up to the basketball net in our driveway, "I love you because you let me play basketball").
And the truth is, a love of a human being is far deeper than a love of a special day. And how long will it take for Liam to truly realize the depth of his feelings? And to gain perspective on musical preferences? I'm thinking that we have more hope for the latter and I'm also thinking of getting him some really good headphones for Christmas sometime before he turns 14.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Has Two Little Helpers
Here's a question? Why do I encourage my children to help out? We all know that it takes three times the amount of time to put the laundry away when you have to keep saying, "Put this in the sock drawer", "Put this in the underwear drawer", "Put this in the pants drawer, but not on top of the shorts, on the side where the rest of your pants are." And the clothes always get unfolded to boot!
In fact, I'm not sure why I even try cleaning at all (many of you may even assume that I don't clean if you happen to arrive at my house unannounced mid-week. Liam likes to help with the coffee tables so I on the rare occasions that I am actually able to clear off the table from all of the books, puzzles, socks, (my) schoolwork, mail, etc... I let him clean it off. He uses the (Simply Green) spray bottle to lather up the glass (mind you, this coffee table was bought before having kids- thus the glass insert). Then he uses a single piece of paper towel to soak it all up. Even Brawny isn't that absorbent. So he mops it all up, while splashing onto the carpet and surrounding furniture and then decides to do a second coat. Miraculously the stains tend to survive although very little Simply Green window cleaner is left in the bottle after a cleaning session.
Tonight Joshua decided to help me cooking. Which is very nice because I have very poor time management skills in the kitchen and could use a little back-up support. Unfortunately Josh decided to help out with matters relating to the oven. The oven was turned onto 400 degrees to roast tomatoes for a home-made sauce (can't help but brag- I made a home-made sauce with fresh tomatoes from scratch- unfortunately the allotted 1 1/2 hours was insufficient and at 7 pm I realized that I had forgotten to make the pasta or a meat). I looked behind me as I was chopping up the onions and saw that Joshua had on an oven mitt and was saying "hot hot hot hot..." and I thought that was awfully cute. I went back to chopping onions, got one of those strange motherly instincts, turned around and saw that Joshua was opening up the oven. It only opened up a crack but please do imagine my freak-out. In response, Joshua said "But I was using the hand with the oven mitt!" No, just kidding. Really, he's only 18 months old so in response he screamed and cried very loudly and refused to forgive me for saving his life for the next 30 minutes.
I really should learn my lesson one of these days. After all, two little helpers and my big bad idea was what broke our vacuum cleaner (picture Liam vacuuming while Joshua sat on the canister; which was all sorts of fun until Liam had to pull the vacuum forward. This sounds very mischievous, doesn't it? Until I mention that this was my idea for a game to engage my two helpers. So it was all my fault).
But I do think children helping is a rather good idea in theory. Since they were able to sit up, I've had them help put things away. Joshua throws his own binky into the crib or his bottle into the crib. I admit I've even had him throw away his own diapers before! Liam enjoys using the hose to water our plants in the front yard. And sometimes he even hits the plants with the water rather than flooding the driveway. And when all else fails and simple jobs take me three times as long, I always just remind myself about how appreciative Liam and Josh's future wives will be that I instilled some cleaning skills in my boys.
In fact, I'm not sure why I even try cleaning at all (many of you may even assume that I don't clean if you happen to arrive at my house unannounced mid-week. Liam likes to help with the coffee tables so I on the rare occasions that I am actually able to clear off the table from all of the books, puzzles, socks, (my) schoolwork, mail, etc... I let him clean it off. He uses the (Simply Green) spray bottle to lather up the glass (mind you, this coffee table was bought before having kids- thus the glass insert). Then he uses a single piece of paper towel to soak it all up. Even Brawny isn't that absorbent. So he mops it all up, while splashing onto the carpet and surrounding furniture and then decides to do a second coat. Miraculously the stains tend to survive although very little Simply Green window cleaner is left in the bottle after a cleaning session.
Tonight Joshua decided to help me cooking. Which is very nice because I have very poor time management skills in the kitchen and could use a little back-up support. Unfortunately Josh decided to help out with matters relating to the oven. The oven was turned onto 400 degrees to roast tomatoes for a home-made sauce (can't help but brag- I made a home-made sauce with fresh tomatoes from scratch- unfortunately the allotted 1 1/2 hours was insufficient and at 7 pm I realized that I had forgotten to make the pasta or a meat). I looked behind me as I was chopping up the onions and saw that Joshua had on an oven mitt and was saying "hot hot hot hot..." and I thought that was awfully cute. I went back to chopping onions, got one of those strange motherly instincts, turned around and saw that Joshua was opening up the oven. It only opened up a crack but please do imagine my freak-out. In response, Joshua said "But I was using the hand with the oven mitt!" No, just kidding. Really, he's only 18 months old so in response he screamed and cried very loudly and refused to forgive me for saving his life for the next 30 minutes.
I really should learn my lesson one of these days. After all, two little helpers and my big bad idea was what broke our vacuum cleaner (picture Liam vacuuming while Joshua sat on the canister; which was all sorts of fun until Liam had to pull the vacuum forward. This sounds very mischievous, doesn't it? Until I mention that this was my idea for a game to engage my two helpers. So it was all my fault).
But I do think children helping is a rather good idea in theory. Since they were able to sit up, I've had them help put things away. Joshua throws his own binky into the crib or his bottle into the crib. I admit I've even had him throw away his own diapers before! Liam enjoys using the hose to water our plants in the front yard. And sometimes he even hits the plants with the water rather than flooding the driveway. And when all else fails and simple jobs take me three times as long, I always just remind myself about how appreciative Liam and Josh's future wives will be that I instilled some cleaning skills in my boys.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Didn't Expect Quite Such A Storybook Ending
A mother should be able to read a book to her child without instilling poor morals and violence, don't you think? Than why is it that so many books are just brimming immorality and guns? Not that the two go together, I'm just saying I don't want either in a book I'm reading to my 4 year old.
I brought home an old classic. Babar. Sweet, intelligent, dapper elephant. But he wasn't always that way. First he had to watch a hunter murder his mother. Is this something I was expecting at the beginning of a Babar book? Clearly not. But there it was, a full page colored picture of a hunter in a token safari hat with a gun and a dead elephant mommy. Liam can't read but it was pretty obvious and hard to rush over. Of course, Babar's life isn't so bad. After the death of his mother, he goes into the city, buys a suit and gets adopted by a rich lady and he later becomes King (because he's dressed and therefore more civilized than his jungle peers).
Percillus the Pig is far from a well known classic but I also attempted to read this book to Liam one night at bedtime. I hardly expected that Percillus- who had snuck out at night to work as a nightwatchman to get rid of ugly bumps on his back (instead of resting up for school the next day) would get held up by an aptly named "Al Porcone" with a revolver (I only know it's a revolver because it said "revolver" in the book- the children's picture book). They held him captive, threatened to kill his sister. It's okay though because luckily those bumps on Percillus' back were wings and so he magically learned to fly and he rescued himself and his sister and found a way to implicate the bad guys in the crime.
My husband loves to read Mr. Wolf's Pancakes. This is one of those fractured fairy tales- much like The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs. There's a kindly wolf who plays the mother hen roll of wanting to make pancakes. He needs help reading but no one will help him. He needs certain ingredients but no one will give them to him. Not only that, the villagers (a gingerbread, Chicken Little herself, Wee Willy Winkle, etc...) all are quite rude to him. In the end the pancakes are made, there is knocking at the door and all of the villagers are ready to come over and eat Mr. Wolf's pancakes. So he does what any other fairy tale wolf would do. He eats all of the villagers. Now I can see eating a gingerbread man but Goldilocks too? It's just wrong. Maybe Goldilocks isn't the most moral but does she really deserve to be eaten? And what does this say of the sin of gluttony (a stack of pancakes, 3 pigs, a chicken, Goldilocks, Little Red Riding Hood and a gingerbread for dessert)?
The violence and lack of morals don't end here. Countless books depict dead parents, horrific crimes, graphic guns and nasty teachers like Mrs. Gorp in Sideways Stories of a Wayside School (that's the other thing, I take that a little personally too). It doesn't stop at books. Ever stop to judge Timmy Turner's parents in "Fairly Oddparents"?
So maybe this is all just a great opportunity for parent and child to discuss morality and better choices. Maybe it's a good time to open up a discussion of dangerous fire arms. But at bedtime? For the time being, it may be best to simply not assume that a classic implies good characters and judgement. Because anyone who has read the original Grimm Brothers fairy tales may still be traumatized from the scene where one of Cinderella's wicked step sisters cuts off her big toe to fit into the glass slipper.
I brought home an old classic. Babar. Sweet, intelligent, dapper elephant. But he wasn't always that way. First he had to watch a hunter murder his mother. Is this something I was expecting at the beginning of a Babar book? Clearly not. But there it was, a full page colored picture of a hunter in a token safari hat with a gun and a dead elephant mommy. Liam can't read but it was pretty obvious and hard to rush over. Of course, Babar's life isn't so bad. After the death of his mother, he goes into the city, buys a suit and gets adopted by a rich lady and he later becomes King (because he's dressed and therefore more civilized than his jungle peers).
Percillus the Pig is far from a well known classic but I also attempted to read this book to Liam one night at bedtime. I hardly expected that Percillus- who had snuck out at night to work as a nightwatchman to get rid of ugly bumps on his back (instead of resting up for school the next day) would get held up by an aptly named "Al Porcone" with a revolver (I only know it's a revolver because it said "revolver" in the book- the children's picture book). They held him captive, threatened to kill his sister. It's okay though because luckily those bumps on Percillus' back were wings and so he magically learned to fly and he rescued himself and his sister and found a way to implicate the bad guys in the crime.
My husband loves to read Mr. Wolf's Pancakes. This is one of those fractured fairy tales- much like The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs. There's a kindly wolf who plays the mother hen roll of wanting to make pancakes. He needs help reading but no one will help him. He needs certain ingredients but no one will give them to him. Not only that, the villagers (a gingerbread, Chicken Little herself, Wee Willy Winkle, etc...) all are quite rude to him. In the end the pancakes are made, there is knocking at the door and all of the villagers are ready to come over and eat Mr. Wolf's pancakes. So he does what any other fairy tale wolf would do. He eats all of the villagers. Now I can see eating a gingerbread man but Goldilocks too? It's just wrong. Maybe Goldilocks isn't the most moral but does she really deserve to be eaten? And what does this say of the sin of gluttony (a stack of pancakes, 3 pigs, a chicken, Goldilocks, Little Red Riding Hood and a gingerbread for dessert)?
The violence and lack of morals don't end here. Countless books depict dead parents, horrific crimes, graphic guns and nasty teachers like Mrs. Gorp in Sideways Stories of a Wayside School (that's the other thing, I take that a little personally too). It doesn't stop at books. Ever stop to judge Timmy Turner's parents in "Fairly Oddparents"?
So maybe this is all just a great opportunity for parent and child to discuss morality and better choices. Maybe it's a good time to open up a discussion of dangerous fire arms. But at bedtime? For the time being, it may be best to simply not assume that a classic implies good characters and judgement. Because anyone who has read the original Grimm Brothers fairy tales may still be traumatized from the scene where one of Cinderella's wicked step sisters cuts off her big toe to fit into the glass slipper.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Took A Nap While Hiding In A Crib
It all started this afternoon when Joshua and I played a 30 minute game of "Where's the Duck?" We hid a little rubber duckie under one of ten stacking blocks and then took turns looking for the duck. Most of the time when Joshua was hiding the duckie, I cheated by peeking through my fingers. I just couldn't resist watching him try to figure out why one box would fit over the duckie and another smaller box wouldn't. Inevitably once he hid the duckie, I could easily find it under... the same box it was previously hidden in. This seems to be an unwritten rule of playing hide and go seek with a baby. They tend to use the same hiding spot over and over.
I learned this while playing hide and go seek with Liam a couple of years ago for the first time. We took turns hiding and most times when it was his turn, he just hid in the same spot he had found me in. But that probably wasn't what made him so easy to find. Liam continues to be an easy find because he can't stop giggling. You know how when you are playing hide and go seek, you're supposed to be sooo quiet? Even when the seeker is close-by, you can often get away with your hiding spot just by staying still and holding your breath. Not Liam. He has yet to learn this stealthy strategy. Instead he lets out with loud chuckles as though he's being tickled by an imaginary octopus. It also doesn't help that as soon as I say "Ready or not, here I come!" Liam will shout out, "Mommy, come find me!" or "I'm in the bathroom!" This tends to take away from the mystery.
Tonight after the success of our hide-the-duckie game with Joshua, Liam and I decided to have a real hide and go seek game. We took turns with Liam & I hiding. We tried to give Joshua a turn hiding but when Liam & I closed our eyes Joshua rolled over giggling instead of hiding. Liam had a good spot in the closet but Joshua had peeked so he found him right away. I almost tricked Liam by hiding between the shower curtains but my feet gave me away. My hiding spot in Joshua's crib kept me hidden the longest. With the crib bumpers and Joshy's blanket keeping me hidden, I stayed silent when a giggling Joshua and his brother Liam came into the room. "Mommy, where are you?" Liam asked (actually expecting an answer). After a couple of minutes, I could actually hear a little panic in his voice (not in Joshua's he just started playing with his duckie again) so I pressed Joshua's Glo-Worm's belly. Even with the lullabies, Liam still couldn't find me in the crib... until he got very close and saw the blanket breathing. I knew he found me because he started the uncontrollable giggles again. Isn't it a hilarious sight to see a mommy in a crib? Even Joshua came in for a look.
And speaking of blankets- what is it about blankets that speak insta-hiding-spot for kids under the age of 5? Often times in hide-and-go-seek games, I've found Liam lying right in the middle of the floor, but under a blanket. A blanket can be used to stealthily hide in a corner or even in a laundry basket. But the second that blanket starts to giggle, I'm pretty sure I've found my hider.
Liam's hiding skills may need work but really, Joshua is the worst hider ever. Liam and I both know that hiding with Joshua means you will get found in less than 10 seconds. It doesn't help that he's usually squirming to leave the hiding spot, giggling or poking his head out. And that's how we ended our last round of tonight's homework. Behind the rocker with Joshua squirming, poking his head out and giggling as we were found in one foul swoop by Liam.
I learned this while playing hide and go seek with Liam a couple of years ago for the first time. We took turns hiding and most times when it was his turn, he just hid in the same spot he had found me in. But that probably wasn't what made him so easy to find. Liam continues to be an easy find because he can't stop giggling. You know how when you are playing hide and go seek, you're supposed to be sooo quiet? Even when the seeker is close-by, you can often get away with your hiding spot just by staying still and holding your breath. Not Liam. He has yet to learn this stealthy strategy. Instead he lets out with loud chuckles as though he's being tickled by an imaginary octopus. It also doesn't help that as soon as I say "Ready or not, here I come!" Liam will shout out, "Mommy, come find me!" or "I'm in the bathroom!" This tends to take away from the mystery.
Tonight after the success of our hide-the-duckie game with Joshua, Liam and I decided to have a real hide and go seek game. We took turns with Liam & I hiding. We tried to give Joshua a turn hiding but when Liam & I closed our eyes Joshua rolled over giggling instead of hiding. Liam had a good spot in the closet but Joshua had peeked so he found him right away. I almost tricked Liam by hiding between the shower curtains but my feet gave me away. My hiding spot in Joshua's crib kept me hidden the longest. With the crib bumpers and Joshy's blanket keeping me hidden, I stayed silent when a giggling Joshua and his brother Liam came into the room. "Mommy, where are you?" Liam asked (actually expecting an answer). After a couple of minutes, I could actually hear a little panic in his voice (not in Joshua's he just started playing with his duckie again) so I pressed Joshua's Glo-Worm's belly. Even with the lullabies, Liam still couldn't find me in the crib... until he got very close and saw the blanket breathing. I knew he found me because he started the uncontrollable giggles again. Isn't it a hilarious sight to see a mommy in a crib? Even Joshua came in for a look.
And speaking of blankets- what is it about blankets that speak insta-hiding-spot for kids under the age of 5? Often times in hide-and-go-seek games, I've found Liam lying right in the middle of the floor, but under a blanket. A blanket can be used to stealthily hide in a corner or even in a laundry basket. But the second that blanket starts to giggle, I'm pretty sure I've found my hider.
Liam's hiding skills may need work but really, Joshua is the worst hider ever. Liam and I both know that hiding with Joshua means you will get found in less than 10 seconds. It doesn't help that he's usually squirming to leave the hiding spot, giggling or poking his head out. And that's how we ended our last round of tonight's homework. Behind the rocker with Joshua squirming, poking his head out and giggling as we were found in one foul swoop by Liam.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Is Taking Pictures for Her Next Photobook!
I haven't printed a picture in years (unless I'm sending them to my grandmother). Instead each year I compile all of our photos for the year onto Shutterfly and design a photo book. It's a creative project to some extent but it doesn't look anything like those pimped-out scrapbooks that my kids' babysitter makes for them each year (she has a love for feathery labels on each page). In fact, after 4 years with his babysitter, Liam has about 3 books full of these pages, which is a neat perk. There are pages for each holiday, season and sometimes the more artistic pages like "Bottoms Up". Liam and Josh will just have to live with the fact that their babysitter may have been more creative and artistic with each of their scrapbooks than their mom was with my annual photo book!
The 2009 book is still awaiting purchase on my Shutterfly account and as I wait for the first few teacher paychecks to sink into the account, I begin to realize that the pictures I'm taking right now look an awful lot like the pictures I took a year ago and that those look a bit like the pics taken the year before that (minus Joshy) and so on. And so I said to Bill, "Gee, we just seem to take the same pictures each and every year." And so it is that if you look through the photo books from 2007, 2008, 2009 and (coming-not-so-soon because I won't even start it until January) 2010; the settings just remain the same. You could technically look on page 28 of each of the books and find that we are, say, picking Easter eggs. Or on page 72 picking out our yearly pumpkins. We do tend to set into certain habits, like picking apples every year at the same place (due to their inordinately tasty apple cider donuts). And the summer barbecue pictures do tend to blur together with the mangy looking kids in the sandbox, the grill filled with meat, corn & more meat, and the men tossing a baseball back and forth.
I think in about 15 years I'll remake all of our photo books but instead of making them organized by year, I'll go by event/activity. Because that's where the real change has been. It started out with fewer children in the pictures-but somehow we still looked frazzled. Then the children began to take over until now there are 6 cousins each running in different directions. The faces have changed as Liam has lost his pudgy cheeks and Joshua has (thankfully) grown some more hair. Sometimes I accidentally on purpose dress Josh in a hand-me-down from Liam and have him wear to the same event- just for kicks- only 3 years later. Once all the event-based books were made, they could be used as flip books like the Bazooka Joe or Captain Underpants books! It would be like watching the kids grow up all over again.
Looking through our old photo books (they're Josh's new favorite books) I also see how few pictures we've been taking of "the place" we're at. A picture is not apparently complete without a smiling kid. There are few pictures of Bill or I without kids. Even a picture of a shark needs to have someone's nose pressed up against the glass in front of it. Really, a shark doesn't get his own picture?
Videos are no different. We watched a video of Liam dancing the other day and asked ourselves- didn't we just make a similar video of Josh dancing last week?
I think next year when I take pictures, I'll take really bizarre pictures. I'm going to look for things we haven't done before. But then again, we all really do look forward to our annual trips to: the corn maze in the fall, camping with all of our friends in the summer and day trips to the local museums. So maybe we should skip the picture of Liam pointing in awe at the mastodon skeleton and instead take a picture of- just the mastodon skeleton? But then our book really would never change- he's certainly not going anywhere. Maybe it's time to teach Liam & Josh some funny faces... just to spice our 2011 photo book up a bit.
The 2009 book is still awaiting purchase on my Shutterfly account and as I wait for the first few teacher paychecks to sink into the account, I begin to realize that the pictures I'm taking right now look an awful lot like the pictures I took a year ago and that those look a bit like the pics taken the year before that (minus Joshy) and so on. And so I said to Bill, "Gee, we just seem to take the same pictures each and every year." And so it is that if you look through the photo books from 2007, 2008, 2009 and (coming-not-so-soon because I won't even start it until January) 2010; the settings just remain the same. You could technically look on page 28 of each of the books and find that we are, say, picking Easter eggs. Or on page 72 picking out our yearly pumpkins. We do tend to set into certain habits, like picking apples every year at the same place (due to their inordinately tasty apple cider donuts). And the summer barbecue pictures do tend to blur together with the mangy looking kids in the sandbox, the grill filled with meat, corn & more meat, and the men tossing a baseball back and forth.
I think in about 15 years I'll remake all of our photo books but instead of making them organized by year, I'll go by event/activity. Because that's where the real change has been. It started out with fewer children in the pictures-but somehow we still looked frazzled. Then the children began to take over until now there are 6 cousins each running in different directions. The faces have changed as Liam has lost his pudgy cheeks and Joshua has (thankfully) grown some more hair. Sometimes I accidentally on purpose dress Josh in a hand-me-down from Liam and have him wear to the same event- just for kicks- only 3 years later. Once all the event-based books were made, they could be used as flip books like the Bazooka Joe or Captain Underpants books! It would be like watching the kids grow up all over again.
Looking through our old photo books (they're Josh's new favorite books) I also see how few pictures we've been taking of "the place" we're at. A picture is not apparently complete without a smiling kid. There are few pictures of Bill or I without kids. Even a picture of a shark needs to have someone's nose pressed up against the glass in front of it. Really, a shark doesn't get his own picture?
Videos are no different. We watched a video of Liam dancing the other day and asked ourselves- didn't we just make a similar video of Josh dancing last week?
I think next year when I take pictures, I'll take really bizarre pictures. I'm going to look for things we haven't done before. But then again, we all really do look forward to our annual trips to: the corn maze in the fall, camping with all of our friends in the summer and day trips to the local museums. So maybe we should skip the picture of Liam pointing in awe at the mastodon skeleton and instead take a picture of- just the mastodon skeleton? But then our book really would never change- he's certainly not going anywhere. Maybe it's time to teach Liam & Josh some funny faces... just to spice our 2011 photo book up a bit.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Had a Sick Day
The entire family woke up this morning with a general feeling of ickiness. I tried to open my eyes at 6 am but seriously they were sealed shut (I now will never complain about runny noses again since this cold apparently has decided to hang out... in my eyes). Joshua woke up with his eyes glued shut and a diaper-splosion. I'll define diaper-splosion as a diaper that is so disgustingly full that it just gives up on its job and instead of having a diaper, your baby is covered in icky gel-like goo pebbles. Normally we don't experience diaper-splosions except when we forget to take Liam's pull ups out of his pj pants and they end up in the washing machine. But this was a seriously bad diaper-sposion because it involved all sorts of ickiness in the diaper... well maybe this is just getting too gross. And for those of you who may be judging because we didn't wake up to help Joshy in his sleep- for the record- we were both sick and Josh has been sleeping through the night for well over a year now so (a) if he did wake up, he only must have whimpered and (b) we may have possibly probably slept through this whimpering. At any rate, after Josh's diaper-splosion I decided he needed an immediate bath. Bill didn't wake up until a bit later, very hazy but at least his eyes weren't glued shut like mine were. Liam decided to join in on the fun by saying he also had a sore throat. So Liam, Josh and I had a sick day. I admit that I didn't personally feel too bad today but once I realized I was going to have to wear my glasses (which I got in high school) to my place of work, I made the final decision to stay home with the kids.
Well it turns out that Joshua does have strep throat. And the doctor was grossed out by our eye mucus! I'm glad I followed my mommy instincts. I tend to second guess them. I tend not to be the one to stay home when my kid wakes up with a sniffle or a cough. I'm usually not too sympathetic towards illness... unless there's puke involved. I also hardly put up with my own illnesses. In fact, the urban legend that I didn't even call in sick the day Liam was born until 12 am (he was born just before 7 am) is completely true. Just this summer I ignored Liam when he told me that his stomach hurt (because swimming lessons cost $68 and I really didn't want that money to go to waste) and drove him 7/8ths of the way to swimming lessons only to have to turn around in a commuter parking lot when he puked up blueberry yogurt into the backseat. It really did serve me right that I had to clean that up with a few stray tissues from the glove box.
Actually sick time in our house is not too bad. I admit to loving how cuddly Liam gets when he is sick. Joshua is somewhat of a bear when he's sick but you just have to feel bad for this fun-loving guy who hates tissues.
I will be heading back to work tomorrow and Liam will be going back to preschool. Joshua is staying home with my mother in law in the morning and Bill in the afternoon. Unfortunately, I think I'll probably have to wear these horrible glasses to work tomorrow, which makes me kind of wish I had tested positive for strep too.
Well it turns out that Joshua does have strep throat. And the doctor was grossed out by our eye mucus! I'm glad I followed my mommy instincts. I tend to second guess them. I tend not to be the one to stay home when my kid wakes up with a sniffle or a cough. I'm usually not too sympathetic towards illness... unless there's puke involved. I also hardly put up with my own illnesses. In fact, the urban legend that I didn't even call in sick the day Liam was born until 12 am (he was born just before 7 am) is completely true. Just this summer I ignored Liam when he told me that his stomach hurt (because swimming lessons cost $68 and I really didn't want that money to go to waste) and drove him 7/8ths of the way to swimming lessons only to have to turn around in a commuter parking lot when he puked up blueberry yogurt into the backseat. It really did serve me right that I had to clean that up with a few stray tissues from the glove box.
Actually sick time in our house is not too bad. I admit to loving how cuddly Liam gets when he is sick. Joshua is somewhat of a bear when he's sick but you just have to feel bad for this fun-loving guy who hates tissues.
I will be heading back to work tomorrow and Liam will be going back to preschool. Joshua is staying home with my mother in law in the morning and Bill in the afternoon. Unfortunately, I think I'll probably have to wear these horrible glasses to work tomorrow, which makes me kind of wish I had tested positive for strep too.
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