I heard the term when talking to a twenty-something; which is something I hardly ever do these days (talking to a twenty-something... with the exception of family). And I explained to the twenty-something that (a) I have a bad memory and I don't remember my high school identity so it's not as though I had lost my identity when having kids. I think officially it means I never really had an identity so there wasn't one to lose. And (b) on a similar note, before I had kids all I ever really did was grade papers at school, bring them home and grade papers while watching TV and then on Friday nights go to trivia. And (c) sometimes Moms look like Zombies because we are so flustered that we have to focus and we actually don't see where we're going... we only see where our kids are going so instead of paying attention to things around ourselves we're paying attention to things around them... which is why our kids are completely safe and us Moms are constantly tripping over things and running into trees (and backing out of garages too close to the side of the door and scraping off siding).
I suppose in retrospect I tried to defend myself and perhaps it was a completely fruitless effort because in essence to a twenty-something my life really might seem like one of a zombie.
It was Mother's Day today and Liam was very excited. He wanted to give me his present which turned out to be a home-made notebook and a pen completely wrapped with about six layers of uncoordinated duct tape. He told me underneath it was a pen from a classmate's mother whose phone number had changed at work so she gave all of her old pens to the class to use. He was very excited and then he asked me when Father's Day was because apparently he can't wait for that either. Perhaps they have another pen project in mind. Then Joshua asked when Kids' Day was and I responded like EVERY OTHER person would respond "Every day is Kids' Day." Which it is, I assure you. Even Mother's Day is really Kids' Day in disguise. Today after a lovely breakfast we went to a festival and had a lovely, albeit cold, day. We took pictures next to tulips and then immediately hurried up to the kiddie area to watch a juggler. Then we went to the rock climbing wall where Liam reached the top and rung the buzzer (yay!) and then directly to the bounce houses. As I stood outside a bouncy-bounce obstacle course while my kids goofed off inside, it occurred to me that we had just been bouncing a couple of days ago at Liam's school carnival... and a couple of weeks before that at his baseball opening night and before that there was a birthday party and, well, you get the idea. How much of my time was spent waiting for my kids to bounce in bouncy bounces? How many of our pictures are trying to capture that one glorious moment as they slide down a 40 foot slide? Since when have playgrounds become completely anti-climactic compared to the glory of a bouncy bounce? If it's Mother's Day shouldn't there be a Mother's only bouncy obstacle course? Perhaps we could get our nails done while our kids waited for us outside.
Aha! But it really was Mother's Day because I got to walk up and down the craft aisle at the festival looking for my gift and holding a little guy's hand. We even walked past artists' tents and for lunch I got to eat Pad Thai while they ate pizzas, hot dogs and nachos. Only at a festival, right?
So am I a Mombie? Are you a Mombie? Maybe this kid was just a twenty-something self-centered prick... or maybe he was onto something. What are zombies focused on... brains... more and more brains... and that's about it, right? And Mombies are focused on their kids... it's all about the kids. Yes, but it's sooo much about the kids. It's helping them find matching clothes, treating their allergies, putting them to sleep at night, teaching them to read, working on projects together, holding their hands when you cross busy roads, persuading them to eat their protein before they get ice cream, introducing them to wonderful things like deep fried Snickers, dancing with them, checking out schedules of local festivals in advance so you know what time the juggler is going on, waiting in line for balloon animals and then fixing unwound balloon animals later in the day, cleaning dirt out of shoes, putting together snacks before a baseball game, choosing the right preschool, giving "car washes" instead of showers and having a towel ready to dry out his eyes, coming up with reward-systems to persuade/teach them to become more independent by getting themselves dressed each morning, cutting up their meat, buying fruits and veggies and downloading apps like Fruit Ninja and Where's My Water and every new update for Angry Birds for them to play on your phone. There's a lot on my mind. So I think that settles it. We're not Mombies because we think about more than just one thing, unlike a zombie who only thinks about eating brains for their own self-centered reasons. Yes, you heard me, self-centered reasons. A zombie never thinks of others. A mother always thinks of others. So the self-centered prick is a zombie and I'm just a mom, someone I've always wanted to be. And that's about it for now. Happy Mother's Day to all of you moms out there. Keep up the good work!
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Thanks to the three guys in my life for making me the Mommy I've always wanted to be. I love you up to the moon and down into the earth. |
