I know why the terrible twos are so terrible. And just for the record, they're not just the terrible twos. Bill & I think the "terribles" track more along the 1/2 years. So 1 1/2 years, 2 1/2 years, etc... but that's besides the point. From about 15-30 months young children struggle to communicate with their elders and peers. But yet they know that there is a mode of communication out there. So they know that there is speech, but they can't quite get there themselves. Either that, or they think that their use of language is perfectly sufficient so it's your problem for not catching on quicker. Both theories support the idea that kids of this age will likely be more frustrated and temperamental, because they know what they want, they know there's a way to communicate what they want but they're failing to do so sufficiently.
Being wise to this, I started Joshua on sign language at a very early age. We practiced the sign "more" by touching his fingers together, mostly at mealtimes. Really, that's the only sign language I taught Josh. I thought it was the most significant because often when toddlers want something, they get emotional and forget how to speak (kind of like many of us adults). So I thought "more" would be a good term to learn first. But then I didn't know any other sign language so "more" continues to be the only sign in our vocabulary.
And who wouldn't want more dinosaur chicken? More corn? More of his favorite cartoon? Recently we've been quite proud of our little communicator, asking us for more and even trying to sound it out himself ("muh"). Even Liam responds to Josh's requests for more. Until I realized he wasn't quite asking for "more", but rather just telling us what he wanted. Yesterday he was eating a bowl of chips with salsa but when he said "more", he wasn't asking for more chips. He was asking for Ritz crackers (this took awhile to figure out). Ever since Halloween, he has been pointing to the bucket asking for "more". It's not that hard for me to explain to Liam why we can't have a lot of candy... but Joshua just doesn't seem to grasp the concepts of cavities and hyperactivity yet.
I think "more" is insufficient. I probably should have studied up on some more sign language vocabulary. I think sign language is really needed for a variety of statements, actually. Toddlers do struggle so much to communicate with us, don't you think it would be easier for them to just say with a quick sign, "I'm not really sick, I just want your undivided attention for the next 3 hours". Sign language could help a younger sibling communicate with his older brother or sister, "Leave me alone" or better yet, "When I'm old enough, I will beat you up." And it really could help us solve a significant loss problem in our house; I really do wish there was a sign for, "I dropped your Blue Tooth behind the couch." What we really need is one of those communicators you find in movies like "Up" and "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs"- you know, the one that makes the dog talk in Up and the monkey talk in Cloudy...? Yeah, then a toddler could really get their message across clearly! Like, for example, "I have a poopy diaper, it's really uncomfortable, but I don't want you to change it and if you do I will do all sorts of leg kicks and twists and flips and then run away from you naked."
That's the fun thing about this stage of communication. A lot of it is guessing! And, of course, there's always the balancing act of knowing what that kid of yours is crying over and actually giving it to him or her. But if he uses the "more" sign, shouldn't we just reward that communication? Or will that just make the next stage so much harder- the stage of realizing that you can ask for what you want... but you might not get it anyway. Kind of like candy. Because there's no way I'm giving my baby a candy bar every time Joshua says "more" looking at that bright orange bucket. Afterall, if I did, then there wouldn't be any chocolate left for me...
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