Dumbing Down Television... of all things

     Ideally my children would not watch television.  They would pick up a book to read or play with an empty paper towel roll or collect rocks from outside.  But several times a day, you can find my kids engrossed in television viewing.  Actually, this is not accurate.  Liam can be seen in front of the television while Joshua still just follows me around (no matter how hard I try, I can't get him to focus on the TV screen)... 
     At any rate, Liam has very high standards for his TV viewing.  It must be a cartoon.  Other than that, if it's a cartoon, he feels justified in viewing.  This has it's good points and bad points.  On a positive note, it means that he has little patience for Yo Gabba Gabba and much less for The Wiggles (thankfully, because I'm really not one of those moms who gets turned on by lanky men in long sleeve turtle necks and tight jeans).  On the negative side, some of these cartoons are obviously violent, which is not allowed. But more often than not, the cartoons are just plain stupid.  I mean, really stupid. 
     Take Special Agent Oso, for example. This is a formulaic cartoon centered around clearly the stupidest panda secret special agent EVER.  He's so stupid that his tasks involve simply helping young children (whose parents are always just a distant, kind, voice at the door stating time limits, "Honey, just 10 more minutes...").  For his help, he is usually awarded some type of a Digi-Medal and then is given some super crazy generous gift, like a cruise ship or helicopter. 
     On a show we watched recently, Special Agent Oso was tasked with helping a young child build a snowman.  There's a really annoying song that goes along with the show.  Simply put it sings (in the most annoying tune possible), "Three special steps, that's all you need.  Three special steps, that's all you need.  It's just three special steps!  Just three special steps!" (I am singing this in my head as I write).  Needless to say, there have been three special steps for building a snowman, 3 special steps for making a birthday hat, 3 special steps for ice skating, etc... And, of course, Special Agent Oso needs to be REMINDED of these three special steps.  Seriously, this panda is no James Bond.
     Usually we enjoy the shows on PBS.  In theory, I like the Super Readers but they have the same dumb problem.  Take this scenario. Princess Pea is at a carnival.  Like all adorable, spoiled princesses, she eats too many treats (cotton candy, a soft pretzel, etc...) and then wants MORE (some popcorn).  But she has a problem... her belly hurts.  Am I supposed to pity Princess Pea?  Really?  Does no one know the answer to her problem?  Where is King or Queen Pea?  At any rate, the Super Readers go on a reading adventure where, along the way, they earn Super Letters. The Super Letters provide the Super Story Answer which is... "STOP AND THINK".  Really?  Stop and think?  That's the answer to Princess Pea's problem?  How about "Stop pigging out and being a selfish spoiled princess?" I think that works too!