Worst Best Mom: Revisited... Again

     Perhaps some of you may be thinking that I am a candidate for the Best-of-the-Best Mom list but I assure you, my position of worst of the best must stand.  True, I do help Liam with science experiments and true, I do stand behind Joshua any time he climbs up a steep playground ladder.  These things alone may make you inclined to think I'm simply the best at what I do.  However, I have evidence to the contrary that proves without a sliver of a doubt that I'm not too great at being a good mom.  Here is what I've come up with so far...
1) I missed Liam's first picture day... his KINDERGARTEN picture day.  I know the picture will come out bad, with him pressing his lip back into a false lipless grin... but that's a picture I just want to treasure.  Plus I know he was looking forward to wearing his new shirt and tie so I kind of feel bad for that too.  Now he'll have to dress up on a day that no one else is dressed up and there's a serious chance that he'll look ridiculous and/or will get paint on his tie because inevitably it will end up being an Art day.
2) Tonight at dinner I accidentally served both boys rotten applesauce.  To be fair, it wasn't moldy or anything but after they had both finished their first serving and were begging for more I realized there was an overpowering scent of fermented apple sauce in the air.  Gross.
3) Tonight at bed time I accidentally scratched Liam under his eye with my thumb nail.  I had bitten off my right hand's thumb nail earlier this week so imagine my surprise when the left thumb nail, still razor sharp and long (but not in a pretty long-nail way), ended up somehow gouging my poor child under his eyeball.  And now he's bleeding!
4) I'm considering not getting my kids flu shots this year.
5) I'm considering getting my kids flu shots this year.
6) The other day when I was trying not to yell at Liam for poor behavior in school, I ended up blurting out, "Well everytime you get in the red zone, you miss part of your playtime and that sounds pretty stupid." To which Liam responded, "What's stupid?"  What I should have said was: "Your mother." What I ended up saying was, "Stupid is making bad choices."  Not really correct, actually it's a pretty stupid definition... of stupid.
7) I bought Liam and Joshua light sabres but didn't really want any play fighting going on.  Hmmm... can you say, "Stupid mom"?
8) Sometimes (lots of times) Liam leaves the house without brushing his teeth.  I know, gross right?
9) I don't let my kids win at games.  We played Uno Moo last night as a family (really cute) and I didn't let my kids win.  Full disclosure: they won anyway, but they won fair and square.  Liam has been playing tic-tac-toe the last few nights and I have won almost every round... until finally I lost a round.  I'd like to think this made him feel good about himself, that he finally won the behemoth... or maybe I just don't like to lose?
10) Quite often at night, after the children have gone to bed, I make their favorite snack... popcorn... but eat the whole bowl myself.  I have an air popper.  Maybe I'll pop some for myself right now and throw in a few extra kernals for the kids' snack tomorrow.  Maybe.