We've been to a lot of play dates this summer. I'm thinking between 3-4 each week. We're talking science class with friends, play grounds, birthday parties, museums, camping, barbecues, quick trips to the pool- typical summer stuff. The thing with play dates at this age is that play dates for kids means play dates for moms too. Play dates are a great time to observe other moms at their best, I think, and I have amassed a list of qualities I have seen and admired. I'm thinking some enterprising scientist could just find a way to put all of these qualities together to create a completely perfect "Frankenmama"
1) Protective Mama- Here's the mama who you just don't cross. It's like a mama bear with her cubs.
2) Realist Mama- Look, most of us know our kids have faults but what I really admire is a mom who values their children not in spite of their faults but even because of them. We love our kids, why not love them for all that they are.
3) Organic Mama- I know moms who buy food 100 % organic... even bananas!
4) Glowing Mama- These are the moms that are always smiling lovingly at their kids during the play date. It's a good thing all of my friends and family have cute kids!
5) Clean Mama- Yes, there are some moms out there who clean. I've yet to see the inside of their houses.
6) Busy Mama- I mentioned the science classes, but there's also swimming lessons and what about music class too?
7) Not-fooling-around Mama- This summer one of my mama friends showed up to science class with only one of her preschool aged boys. She said the other one stayed home with Daddy "because he was not being a good listener." I looked at my two boys- one of whom took 15 minutes to put on his socks and the other who pooped his diaper just before we had left that morning (and refused to admit it). Wow. It takes one powerful mama to actually follow through with a consequence.
8) Cool Mama- This is the mama who gets all of that cool stuff like the Bakugans and the Star Wars gear. She's up on the latest Disney and Pixar movies. If she's really cool, she might be able to tell the Transformer bad guys apart.
9) Fit Mama- Some moms don't just exercise but they also spend time with their kids at the same time! Several of us have jogging strollers but how often do people actually use them for running (and not just going to the grocery store)? Yes, there's people who even join exercising-with-kids classes!
10) Attentive Mama- Some moms are more attentive than others. This is easier with fewer kids of course! Still, there are some moms who actually do remember to put sunscreen on their kids before they leave the house each day, which is quite a feat (considering I've lost all four bottles of sunscreen I had this summer).
11) Chillin' Mama- Bee stings, bickering kids & overdue naps don't seem to phase some people as much as they do for others. Sometimes having a laid back mama is just what a kid needs to learn to be independent and creative.
12) Teaching Mama- Full disclosure here, many of my friends are teachers- so it's not too surprising that we've done science projects with our kids and practiced their pre-reading skills!
13) Patient Mama- Mmm... patience is answering the same question for the 11th time today, patience is watching the same movie every morning.
14) Practical Mama- This mama knows that her kids are going to watch some TV today so she can wash her hair and make lunch. She also knows that the kids are going to have to eat their Halloween candy some time so they may as well have a sweet tart after lunch.
15) Outdoorsy Mama- Moms who are not afraid of a little sunshine, ticks and sweat are bound to get their kids outside more, especially this time of year. Sometimes it's easier to stay indoors where it's air conditioned but then how will your kids ever experience worms wiggling in the palm of their hand?
On second thought, I think Frankenmama just might be too perfect. Sometimes you need to lose your patience to truly appreciate what patience is. And every once in awhile, a kid who is used to being watched and followed by a terrifically attentive mother needs to escape and be unwatched by a mom who knows how to chill out. Still, maybe it's healthier to grow up in an organic, germ free environment, but then again maybe it's okay to build up a kid's immune system too.
Kids aren't perfect so why should their parents be? And if they really love us, they will love us even when we're not the perfect mother anyway.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Goodnights Seem To Last All Night
What do you like to do at bedtime? Watch the news? Brush your teeth? Drink some tea? Chances is are it's not as elaborate a ritual at our bedtime (unless you have kids or pets of your own). We've got the tooth brushing and getting on pajamas but that's not all. There needs to be stories- not just one but two. There needs to be rocking and hugging and goodnights. And mind you, this is multiplied by two because they each have their unique bedtime needs. Liam has graduated to chapter books, like James and the Giant Peach and Runaway Ralph whereas Josh likes his favorite board books (Goodnight Baby) and picture books (In the Night Kitchen) read over and over again. Then with Liam there needs to be stargazing- at his glow in the dark stars. Upstairs in Joshua's room you need to play his Sleepy Time CD and stick around for a song or two, hugging him from the floor because there's not room to cuddle on his tiny toddler bed.
All of this used to be sufficient for a good night ritual but it seems like the kids are tricking us into more elaborate schemes. It's summer time so Joshua has been having a mommy-crush. I've put him to bed most nights this summer and bedtime just isn't getting any easier. First of all, he insists on more than two books. Somehow he started sweet talking his way into getting two books on the rocking chair... and then one more book in his bed. And if I wasn't tricked enough by this two year old, he's also managed to work in a nightly rendition of "On Top of Spaghetti" and a retelling of "The 3 Little Pigs" into his bedtime routine. Meanwhile downstairs Liam and his Daddy have found themselves in a never-ending battle to be the last to say goodnight. The few times I have put Liam to bed this summer, he's managed to stalk me around the house badgering me with "I said goodnight!"
Bedtime is supposed to be calming, quieting, soothing but thanks to the demands it's become a bit more dreaded in my house. I could really do without the nightly discussion of why Joshua can't bring a cup of milk to his bed (day old milk in a sippy cup in the summer time... the only thing worse is a sippy cup that's rolled under the bed and not found for more than a week) and why juice isn't a good choice either. Liam likes to have three glasses of water so he can do some sort of a pouring ritual. I'm not sure I understand it, but he gets upset when I wash even one of the cups.
Here's the thing, despite our grandest efforts to soothe and comfort at bedtime, despite the increasingly longer schedule of events, Joshua just seems to be having more and more trouble falling asleep at bedtime. Unfortunately the little guy who used to fall asleep when his head hit the pillow can usually be heard at naptime giggling and jumping on his bed or crying at bedtime for another hug.
All of these rituals have me staying up with the kids instead of participating in my own bedtime rituals. There's less and less time for me to eat my bowl of popcorn, grade math worksheets, watch my reality shows or check my facebook most recent news. I may have to take a stand to take bedtimes back. I think it'll start with the books- a strict two, I think, is sufficient. And possibly "On Top of Spaghetti" would be better for a waking up song than at bedtime. That 30-60 sliver of time is too important for me to give up. Afterall, I don't want to have to share my bowl of popcorn.
All of this used to be sufficient for a good night ritual but it seems like the kids are tricking us into more elaborate schemes. It's summer time so Joshua has been having a mommy-crush. I've put him to bed most nights this summer and bedtime just isn't getting any easier. First of all, he insists on more than two books. Somehow he started sweet talking his way into getting two books on the rocking chair... and then one more book in his bed. And if I wasn't tricked enough by this two year old, he's also managed to work in a nightly rendition of "On Top of Spaghetti" and a retelling of "The 3 Little Pigs" into his bedtime routine. Meanwhile downstairs Liam and his Daddy have found themselves in a never-ending battle to be the last to say goodnight. The few times I have put Liam to bed this summer, he's managed to stalk me around the house badgering me with "I said goodnight!"
Bedtime is supposed to be calming, quieting, soothing but thanks to the demands it's become a bit more dreaded in my house. I could really do without the nightly discussion of why Joshua can't bring a cup of milk to his bed (day old milk in a sippy cup in the summer time... the only thing worse is a sippy cup that's rolled under the bed and not found for more than a week) and why juice isn't a good choice either. Liam likes to have three glasses of water so he can do some sort of a pouring ritual. I'm not sure I understand it, but he gets upset when I wash even one of the cups.
Here's the thing, despite our grandest efforts to soothe and comfort at bedtime, despite the increasingly longer schedule of events, Joshua just seems to be having more and more trouble falling asleep at bedtime. Unfortunately the little guy who used to fall asleep when his head hit the pillow can usually be heard at naptime giggling and jumping on his bed or crying at bedtime for another hug.
All of these rituals have me staying up with the kids instead of participating in my own bedtime rituals. There's less and less time for me to eat my bowl of popcorn, grade math worksheets, watch my reality shows or check my facebook most recent news. I may have to take a stand to take bedtimes back. I think it'll start with the books- a strict two, I think, is sufficient. And possibly "On Top of Spaghetti" would be better for a waking up song than at bedtime. That 30-60 sliver of time is too important for me to give up. Afterall, I don't want to have to share my bowl of popcorn.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Two Steps Back
Regression. Let's talk about it. Why is it that regression occurs when its least convenient? It just seems like you put so much effort into something and then BAM! There's a backslide. I had two goals this summer (well more than that, but two over-arching goals). The first was to get Joshua back on track with potty training and the second was to get Liam off his nap schedule.
Joshua has been resisting potty training since this past winter when he made a couple successful attempts but then backed off and wanted to remain a baby. He apparently has no interest in stickers or potty dances. Anyway, I figured I had all summer to work on it. And all was going well, I might say. I made him several a potty charts and he was enjoying sticking on the stickers. He was oddly fascinated with using potties outside of our home and made special efforts at houses of our friends & family as well as in public restrooms (yeah! Doesn't every mom want their kid peeing on the potty at the grocery store... oh wait, probably not). Then I left him for two nights. It was seriously less than 48 hours. Now he wants to hear nothing of the potty. It's his sworn nemesis. I've backed off a bit, but even that isn't working. After two weeks of laying off of him, I was thrilled yesterday when he said, "Me use potty later". But then I had to act unruffled when later came and still he did not want to use his potty.
Getting Liam off of his napping schedule is also a no-go. The only reason I'm able to be writing this now is because he's still slumbering in his bed. 2 years ago when Joshua was a baby I remember battling it out with Liam over his nap-time. I stood by his door, I threatened, I yelled but nothing. He was 3 years old and he decided he wasn't going to nap anymore. I started to act like it didn't matter. I would say, "Whatever, you can nap or not. It's your choice." And the more "whatever" I acted like, the more he wanted to nap. It took a bit of flexibility on my part too. I had to be open to Liam sleeping wherever he wanted. This has included next to his bed, in his room tent and my personal favorite (no joke)- with his legs under his bed and his head and upper body inside of his laundry basket. So here he is at 5 still napping most days. I'm not complaining, I love a good nap... for my kids that is. It's just that now school is starting and they only have a 15 minute "rest" period. We'll see how that goes.
It's not just the kids who have regressed. It's me too. How many years of parenting did it take for me to not insist on matching place mats with napkins? I used to compete with Martha Stewart and now the best way for me to have matching napkins at the table is by using paper. I used to have a strong non-violent policy so why is it that I let Liam buy a foam sword with his allowance? I actually bought one for Joshua too because I didn't want him to be defenseless. I used to weed the garden and now I just add more mulch. Maybe regression is our way of letting go of what is less important to us. Why take energy out of a busy day to do something as silly as ironing a tablecloth? And if it's a fun summer day and you're playing pirates with your big brother and you happen to be wearing a diaper? Well, maybe that's why Joshua just needs a break from using the potty.
Joshua has been resisting potty training since this past winter when he made a couple successful attempts but then backed off and wanted to remain a baby. He apparently has no interest in stickers or potty dances. Anyway, I figured I had all summer to work on it. And all was going well, I might say. I made him several a potty charts and he was enjoying sticking on the stickers. He was oddly fascinated with using potties outside of our home and made special efforts at houses of our friends & family as well as in public restrooms (yeah! Doesn't every mom want their kid peeing on the potty at the grocery store... oh wait, probably not). Then I left him for two nights. It was seriously less than 48 hours. Now he wants to hear nothing of the potty. It's his sworn nemesis. I've backed off a bit, but even that isn't working. After two weeks of laying off of him, I was thrilled yesterday when he said, "Me use potty later". But then I had to act unruffled when later came and still he did not want to use his potty.
Getting Liam off of his napping schedule is also a no-go. The only reason I'm able to be writing this now is because he's still slumbering in his bed. 2 years ago when Joshua was a baby I remember battling it out with Liam over his nap-time. I stood by his door, I threatened, I yelled but nothing. He was 3 years old and he decided he wasn't going to nap anymore. I started to act like it didn't matter. I would say, "Whatever, you can nap or not. It's your choice." And the more "whatever" I acted like, the more he wanted to nap. It took a bit of flexibility on my part too. I had to be open to Liam sleeping wherever he wanted. This has included next to his bed, in his room tent and my personal favorite (no joke)- with his legs under his bed and his head and upper body inside of his laundry basket. So here he is at 5 still napping most days. I'm not complaining, I love a good nap... for my kids that is. It's just that now school is starting and they only have a 15 minute "rest" period. We'll see how that goes.
It's not just the kids who have regressed. It's me too. How many years of parenting did it take for me to not insist on matching place mats with napkins? I used to compete with Martha Stewart and now the best way for me to have matching napkins at the table is by using paper. I used to have a strong non-violent policy so why is it that I let Liam buy a foam sword with his allowance? I actually bought one for Joshua too because I didn't want him to be defenseless. I used to weed the garden and now I just add more mulch. Maybe regression is our way of letting go of what is less important to us. Why take energy out of a busy day to do something as silly as ironing a tablecloth? And if it's a fun summer day and you're playing pirates with your big brother and you happen to be wearing a diaper? Well, maybe that's why Joshua just needs a break from using the potty.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Why I Had To Vacuum Twice This Weekend
It isn't the first time someone has asked but this weekend as I was cleaning our kitchen just before our annual summer barbecue, my dad asked it again, "Why are you cleaning before the party?"
I suppose it's a good question but to answer that question I will need to explain some of my other quirks when it comes to cleaning. First, let it be known that I am the furthest thing from a neat freak. I don't really completely believe in germs (except when those kids come into my class with their runny noses, chew on their pencils and then leave their tissues lying around). I don't have a schedule for cleaning the house and I do completely admit that more than half of the days of the week I go to bed with a sink full of dishes in the kitchen. So now I've "outed" myself. My house is a wreck most times and it's not all the kids' fault. My schoolwork lies around in various stacks, we've got cell phone chargers sticking out of every outlet and there are crumbs on the counter that the kids can't even reach. But really, we're not exactly slobs. We know a mess when we see one and we both really do make an effort to clean it up (I say both because, no, the boys do not "know a mess when they see one" and, no, they do not "make an effort to clean it up"). I'll come upstairs after checking my email and there's Bill picking up the "zoo maminals" or he'll keep our favorite TV show paused while I finish up a load of dishes (okay, sometimes I do the dishes before bed). We do really try, it's just so much to keep up with! There's tons of laundry and whenever I find myself taking a two-day vacation from laundry someone yells at me because they're out of socks, or their favorite underwear isn't clean or I run out of one of the three pairs of shorts that still actually fit me.
I have friends who actually do clean their houses... and not just because company is coming over. But really any amount of cleaning with kids in the house is borderline futile and barely-worth-it. No matter how often you wash the dishes, there will still be more dishes. No matter how often you do the laundry, there will be more and more filthy dirty socks (and it doesn't help if your kids like to play in the mud like mine do). No matter how often you clean up the toys- with or without the kids' help- they'll find a way to take out more toys and make more of a mess with smaller pieces. And after all of that washing and picking up, is there really time for the dusting and the spraying and the scrubbing? Really?
It's not just a working mom thing either. During the school year, I would like to assure myself that I can't clean up as much as I would like to "because I'm a working mom". I'm so busy! I leave early in the morning, return for just enough time to play, have dinner, put the kids to bed and then do more schoolwork. But now over the summer, I am home and yikes! I've got to tell you, I've got plenty more time at home with the kids but not much more is being cleaned. Maybe it's because I'm so busy with all of the play dates and the classes and the activities or maybe it's because the kids are home more so they're making more messes. Whatever the reason, there's still a full sink of dishes in my sink right now (in my defense, I did do the dishes just before dinner tonight so the dishwasher is running). It seems that if I ever do hire a cleaning lady, I will have to hire her year-round.
Judgement. That's why I clean before parties. I don't want to be unfairly- okay "fairly"- judged as a messy homemaker. It's bad enough I didn't have time to vacuum the cobwebs before the party this weekend, did I really want people seeing all of the unfolded towels in the hallway closet (easy remedy- close the closet)? I know; during the party the floor will get all crummy, the carpet will get muddy and the toys will get strewn around in a giant muddled mess of plastic. But after all of the guests are gone, I get to clean up at my own pace. No one comes over after the party and turns up their nose at you because your Candy Land pieces are mixed in with the Legos (seriously kids? Did you have to take out Candy Land?). No, I can handle clean up after a party. I can even deal with the three days worth of dishes afterwards. But before hand, I do feel the need to clean and I'm not afraid to admit it. I don't mind if people know the truth- my house isn't always (usually) clean. But I'd rather if they not be confronted with that reality when they stop by for a barbecue.
Judgement. Who am I really afraid of anyway? I hate to admit, but I think I'm my own worst judge. You know when your kids are being so unbelievably cute that you just need to take out the video camera? Well, I've been known to actually run around the house for five minutes picking things up while hoping my kids maintain their cuteness just so I can start filming them in a more tidy scene. And even then, I find myself holding the camera at an angle to avoid more messy locations in the house: "No boys, be cute in the living room, not the kitchen!" And who will be watching these videos someday? The boys? I doubt they'll notice or care. No, me. I will be watching the videos and I don't really want proof that I didn't have time to clean. Just like I don't want proof noticed by friends and family that I don't clean enough either.
So there it is folks, I don't want to be unfairly judged... by you or by me. So if you come over at the start of the party, you might just see what I wish my house looked like all of the time- or maybe all you will see are the cobwebs and the dirt I couldn't reach in the corners.
I suppose it's a good question but to answer that question I will need to explain some of my other quirks when it comes to cleaning. First, let it be known that I am the furthest thing from a neat freak. I don't really completely believe in germs (except when those kids come into my class with their runny noses, chew on their pencils and then leave their tissues lying around). I don't have a schedule for cleaning the house and I do completely admit that more than half of the days of the week I go to bed with a sink full of dishes in the kitchen. So now I've "outed" myself. My house is a wreck most times and it's not all the kids' fault. My schoolwork lies around in various stacks, we've got cell phone chargers sticking out of every outlet and there are crumbs on the counter that the kids can't even reach. But really, we're not exactly slobs. We know a mess when we see one and we both really do make an effort to clean it up (I say both because, no, the boys do not "know a mess when they see one" and, no, they do not "make an effort to clean it up"). I'll come upstairs after checking my email and there's Bill picking up the "zoo maminals" or he'll keep our favorite TV show paused while I finish up a load of dishes (okay, sometimes I do the dishes before bed). We do really try, it's just so much to keep up with! There's tons of laundry and whenever I find myself taking a two-day vacation from laundry someone yells at me because they're out of socks, or their favorite underwear isn't clean or I run out of one of the three pairs of shorts that still actually fit me.
I have friends who actually do clean their houses... and not just because company is coming over. But really any amount of cleaning with kids in the house is borderline futile and barely-worth-it. No matter how often you wash the dishes, there will still be more dishes. No matter how often you do the laundry, there will be more and more filthy dirty socks (and it doesn't help if your kids like to play in the mud like mine do). No matter how often you clean up the toys- with or without the kids' help- they'll find a way to take out more toys and make more of a mess with smaller pieces. And after all of that washing and picking up, is there really time for the dusting and the spraying and the scrubbing? Really?
It's not just a working mom thing either. During the school year, I would like to assure myself that I can't clean up as much as I would like to "because I'm a working mom". I'm so busy! I leave early in the morning, return for just enough time to play, have dinner, put the kids to bed and then do more schoolwork. But now over the summer, I am home and yikes! I've got to tell you, I've got plenty more time at home with the kids but not much more is being cleaned. Maybe it's because I'm so busy with all of the play dates and the classes and the activities or maybe it's because the kids are home more so they're making more messes. Whatever the reason, there's still a full sink of dishes in my sink right now (in my defense, I did do the dishes just before dinner tonight so the dishwasher is running). It seems that if I ever do hire a cleaning lady, I will have to hire her year-round.
Judgement. That's why I clean before parties. I don't want to be unfairly- okay "fairly"- judged as a messy homemaker. It's bad enough I didn't have time to vacuum the cobwebs before the party this weekend, did I really want people seeing all of the unfolded towels in the hallway closet (easy remedy- close the closet)? I know; during the party the floor will get all crummy, the carpet will get muddy and the toys will get strewn around in a giant muddled mess of plastic. But after all of the guests are gone, I get to clean up at my own pace. No one comes over after the party and turns up their nose at you because your Candy Land pieces are mixed in with the Legos (seriously kids? Did you have to take out Candy Land?). No, I can handle clean up after a party. I can even deal with the three days worth of dishes afterwards. But before hand, I do feel the need to clean and I'm not afraid to admit it. I don't mind if people know the truth- my house isn't always (usually) clean. But I'd rather if they not be confronted with that reality when they stop by for a barbecue.
Judgement. Who am I really afraid of anyway? I hate to admit, but I think I'm my own worst judge. You know when your kids are being so unbelievably cute that you just need to take out the video camera? Well, I've been known to actually run around the house for five minutes picking things up while hoping my kids maintain their cuteness just so I can start filming them in a more tidy scene. And even then, I find myself holding the camera at an angle to avoid more messy locations in the house: "No boys, be cute in the living room, not the kitchen!" And who will be watching these videos someday? The boys? I doubt they'll notice or care. No, me. I will be watching the videos and I don't really want proof that I didn't have time to clean. Just like I don't want proof noticed by friends and family that I don't clean enough either.
So there it is folks, I don't want to be unfairly judged... by you or by me. So if you come over at the start of the party, you might just see what I wish my house looked like all of the time- or maybe all you will see are the cobwebs and the dirt I couldn't reach in the corners.
Monday, August 1, 2011
They Have Tear Free Shampoo, Why Not Scream Free?
When my kids feel injured they don't just cry, they scream. Liam particularly. He rarely takes stock of his wounds before screaming out in hysteria. I think Joshua may be learning from him too because he has been known to shout over minor bumps and falls.
It's not that I'm not sympathetic but we're really talking about injuries that lack crucial signs of actually being injuries. They might bump their head or fall down (in the grass) and break out into blood curdling screams. I walk over in my due time only to find that there's no injury to be seen. No bruise, no redness, no blood (though they try to persuade me otherwise), nothing. And yet they're inconsolable.
Why would I be so horrible as to only walk over to my wounded young? Well, it's just experience. They've really trained me and not in a good way. It's hard to explain to children under the age of 7 this whole "Boy Who Cried Wolf" thing. I've tried to tell the fable but there's just no connection between a boy in a field with sheep crying "Wolf" and them feeling as though they've been permanently scarred several times a day. They just don't see the connection that the more they scream over little things, the harder it is for me to muster up a run over to their help. I DO HELP MY KIDS IN NEED (no misunderstandings there please). I'm just saying that if my child screams bloody murder and you are very concerned and you see me walking, not running, there's a reason why. Most times it's nothing more than a little red and there's really nothing I can do besides give a kiss. Whoever thought that kids would sit with an ice pack on their head really hasn't met my kids (it doesn't matter if we use the boo boo bunny or an ice pack shaped like a car, they'll tolerate it for all of 15 seconds). Recently after I gave Liam the obligatory boo-boo-kiss he actually looked up at me and said, "You know, kissing it doesn't make it better!" So who am I kidding? Maybe they need a band aid but that's surprisingly rare. We've had our Snoopy band aids for over 2 years and now that we have the new box- the Transformers, Liam is just dying to get hurt to use up those old band aids so he can start using the Transformers!
Of course, there's always those times when there is actually a wolf. Take the time that Liam screamed at a play date. He had been running around in a good friend's backyard. A friend who takes good care of her backyard. Liam was barefoot and playing in the pool and then onto a small playground. When he cried out I went over and I did see some blood on his foot. I lovingly picked him up and sat him on a chair. I told him I would be right back with a band aid (I omitted the fact that since we were at a girl's house, he would probably end up with a Hello Kitty band aid, not a Transformer). Well as I was finding a towel and band aid inside, apparently the situation became more perilous outside. Liam started gushing blood out of his foot. Within a short time he was back playing which left me to reflect. Did I move too slow? Should I panic every time he or Josh panics (mind you, that's 3 times each a day)?
I think the answers are "No" and "No". I wouldn't say I moved slow, just efficiently and I wouldn't say I should panic, it's certainly preferable to maintain calm especially if there is an emergency to deal with.
But I think I lost sight of the title of this entry... it's what made me think of the drama kings currently sleeping in their beds. Earlier tonight they were both in the bath getting shampooed and lathered up. Why is it that their kiddie shampoo says "Tear Free" yet both kids panic in utter despair every time soap gets close to even an eyelid (let alone an eyeball)? Unfortunately our bathroom is somewhat echoey and I really could do without all of the screaming in the tub! It's just soap and it's not like it's grown up soap (have you ever had Pert Plus in your eye?)! So I've decided I will try it out just to see if it really is tear free. I am a little reluctant because I've read and heard about parents trying this experiment before...and the moment of truth is:
It stings and I can't help but cry a little bit (but I'm not screaming about it!). Seriously, my eyes are watering up. I don't think I want to try the body wash.
It's not that I'm not sympathetic but we're really talking about injuries that lack crucial signs of actually being injuries. They might bump their head or fall down (in the grass) and break out into blood curdling screams. I walk over in my due time only to find that there's no injury to be seen. No bruise, no redness, no blood (though they try to persuade me otherwise), nothing. And yet they're inconsolable.
Why would I be so horrible as to only walk over to my wounded young? Well, it's just experience. They've really trained me and not in a good way. It's hard to explain to children under the age of 7 this whole "Boy Who Cried Wolf" thing. I've tried to tell the fable but there's just no connection between a boy in a field with sheep crying "Wolf" and them feeling as though they've been permanently scarred several times a day. They just don't see the connection that the more they scream over little things, the harder it is for me to muster up a run over to their help. I DO HELP MY KIDS IN NEED (no misunderstandings there please). I'm just saying that if my child screams bloody murder and you are very concerned and you see me walking, not running, there's a reason why. Most times it's nothing more than a little red and there's really nothing I can do besides give a kiss. Whoever thought that kids would sit with an ice pack on their head really hasn't met my kids (it doesn't matter if we use the boo boo bunny or an ice pack shaped like a car, they'll tolerate it for all of 15 seconds). Recently after I gave Liam the obligatory boo-boo-kiss he actually looked up at me and said, "You know, kissing it doesn't make it better!" So who am I kidding? Maybe they need a band aid but that's surprisingly rare. We've had our Snoopy band aids for over 2 years and now that we have the new box- the Transformers, Liam is just dying to get hurt to use up those old band aids so he can start using the Transformers!
Of course, there's always those times when there is actually a wolf. Take the time that Liam screamed at a play date. He had been running around in a good friend's backyard. A friend who takes good care of her backyard. Liam was barefoot and playing in the pool and then onto a small playground. When he cried out I went over and I did see some blood on his foot. I lovingly picked him up and sat him on a chair. I told him I would be right back with a band aid (I omitted the fact that since we were at a girl's house, he would probably end up with a Hello Kitty band aid, not a Transformer). Well as I was finding a towel and band aid inside, apparently the situation became more perilous outside. Liam started gushing blood out of his foot. Within a short time he was back playing which left me to reflect. Did I move too slow? Should I panic every time he or Josh panics (mind you, that's 3 times each a day)?
I think the answers are "No" and "No". I wouldn't say I moved slow, just efficiently and I wouldn't say I should panic, it's certainly preferable to maintain calm especially if there is an emergency to deal with.
But I think I lost sight of the title of this entry... it's what made me think of the drama kings currently sleeping in their beds. Earlier tonight they were both in the bath getting shampooed and lathered up. Why is it that their kiddie shampoo says "Tear Free" yet both kids panic in utter despair every time soap gets close to even an eyelid (let alone an eyeball)? Unfortunately our bathroom is somewhat echoey and I really could do without all of the screaming in the tub! It's just soap and it's not like it's grown up soap (have you ever had Pert Plus in your eye?)! So I've decided I will try it out just to see if it really is tear free. I am a little reluctant because I've read and heard about parents trying this experiment before...and the moment of truth is:
It stings and I can't help but cry a little bit (but I'm not screaming about it!). Seriously, my eyes are watering up. I don't think I want to try the body wash.
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